Doubts Even Here

Those steps which seem to take a lifetime
When eyes just turn and stare
Day begins, collapsing without warning
You fade from sight, there's nothing there

No hope allowed, calls are answered daily
Questions are on your side
Deeply moved, beyond all consolation
You felt the pulse, now, hear the cry

In my mind thoughts are becoming clearer
I'm watching every move you make
Counting time spent in observation
A single blow, a false mistake

Then you revealed to me
All that I need to know now (I was dazed, and I could not speak)
Then please don't turn away
Why can't I talk to you now? (My thoughts went back to times long past)

There's nowhere left to go (I remembered forgotten years)
Where is this taking her and how? (All night long, I was in deep distress)
(As I lay thinking, my spirit was sunk in deep despair)
There's nothing more I want
To know beyond your trust now (will the Lord reject us for evermore and never again show favor?)
(Has his unfailing love now failed us utterly?)

Don't throw our joy away
Why must you just you leave now? (Must his promise time and again be unfulfilled?)
Memories are all that's left (has God forgotten to be gracious?)
I need you near to me now (has he in anger withheld his mercies?)
(But then, O Lord, I call to mind thy deeds)
(I recall thy wonderful acts in times gone by)