The Last Thing I Saw

The last thing I saw
Before I went under
Was a hoofprint in the pool liner

He said a horse fell in last spring
Y'all really should have seen it
Such a large, thrashing thing
Honestly, it was startling

But this is how it's always felt
Like I'm only arriving
Where you've already been

And even now I feel it
You've shown me your power
By where you conceal it

The last series we sat through
Featured this
8-foot, papier-mâché Mayan pyramid
He said "test everything
And hold fast to the good"
So we got engaged that winter
Right there at the end of the world

But this is how it's always worked
You give us understanding
When we lean on yours

And even now, I feel it
Your mercies keep following me
And time keeps revealing it

You must have been tumbling
In the carpet of my childhood
When I played

Cause even when I felt your absence
Your impression remained

You preoccupied my adolescence like
An open-carry on the hip
Of the woman I knew I'd marry
Her name was fear and trembling

But this is how it's always felt
Like I'm only arriving
Where you've already been

And even now I feel it
You've shown me your power
By where you conceal it

But then college hit
And the New Atheists
Rode their bus campaigns
On public-speaking streaks

And I was cowering under
Comments about
The Amalekites and God's providence

Then Hitch will get his diagnosis
And someone's daughter somewhere gets
The same
But the former will never fathom why
Grieving fathers give you praise

Cos this is how it's always been
You're waiting beside
Hospital beds
In chambers of my heart
That life hasn't broken yet

But even now
I feel it
You've shown me your power
No grave can seal in

And this is how it's always felt
Like I'm only arriving
Where you've already been

And even now I feel it
You've shown me your power
By where you conceal it