Louisa

Louisa was a movie queen
Before she'd achieved the age of sweet sixteen
Long before Cagney threw those girls about
Little Louisa tossed her curls about
Later when the talkies came
The whole world resounded to her fame
Each time she married
Every daily paper carried
Headlines blazing her name
Not only headlines
But photographs and interviews
Every thing she did was news that held the world in thrall
Some say she read lines better than Marléne could
No other entertainer could
Compete with her at all
But regardless of the fact
That she could sing and dance and act
And owned furniture that wasn't "Little Rockery"
And regardless of her gems, which were hers not MGM's
Her life was one long mockery

Louisa was terribly lonely
Sucess brought her naught but despair
She derived little fun
From the oscars she'd won
And none
From her home in Bel Aire
She said she was weary of living
On this bestial, terrestrial plane
When friends came to visit
Their hands she would clutch
Crying, "Tell me why is it I suffer so much?
Oh, if only, if only, if only
My life wasn't quite such a strain."
And soon after that she was terribly lonely
All over again

Louisa was terribly lonely
Louisa was terribly sad
It appears that the cheers that had rung in her ears
For years had been driving her mad
She sobbed when men offered her sables
And moaned when they gave her champagne
She remarked to her groom on their honeymoon night
As he tenderly kissed her and switched off the light
"Oh, If only, if only, if only
I'd flung myself out of that plane..."
And the very next day she was terribly lonely
All over again

Louisa was terribly lonely
(The girl had no fun)
Louisa was tired of it all
(Not a call from anyone)
She gazed like a dazed, frustrated sphinx
At her hundred and eight new tated minx
And she wrung her hands
And she beat her breast
Crying, "My, my, my, I'm so depressed."
Nobody knew the troubles she'd seen
Nobody knew, but you-know-who
The tribulations of a movie queen

So, farewell to lovely Louisa
(We'll just let life tease her.)
Let's leave her searching in vain
(Find someone to explain.)
Why destiny
Singled her out to be
Only
Lonely
Over and over again