Seasonal Affective Disorder Medley - Live at Union Tavern, Somerville, MA, April 29, 2023 (Live)

Rapping through the pain like a tourniquet
I remember when I was playing in them tournaments
Old peacoat had me looking like a journalist
These memories keep my mind light through the turbulence
I'm certain that I'm good for now, all you can do is trust me
As a kid, I wasn't moving funny, but I grew up lucky
Back when my voice sounded like Quas and I was super unseen
Rule of thumb was do my best and take it to the umpteenth
Music runs deep as bad habits, the truth is ugly
After breakthroughs come unease
Wish the solution's just breathe
'Flecting on my traits like who could love me?
Who could want me?
Will you resume your studies?
You content with losing money?
Autumn evolution, stepping through these crushed leaves
Artists executing make a dude feel hungry
While other people bloom, I'm wilting, so my tune not upbeat
Is it truly just me?
Uh, I keep thinking
The once starry eyes keep blinking
The Doomsday Clock keep ticking
Union Square Guitar Center, I keep entering
Try to catch my breath between bridges, can I pause for a minute?
Circadian rhythm never-ending
Nothing new, every thought rewritten
No ingredient ever kept out the kitchen when I'm in it
Every course pending, blame it on the biggest critic

At the bottom of the well, all wishes void and null
A penny from they hand fell a height and broke my skull
Zeros and ones dictating who you are and what to pull
The loaded few hoard the food, but their bellies wasn't full
Seasons change, regimes stay in these days that we've entered
Those in the cave seen a flicker, can we sway the momentum?
Body the ruins of a sacred temple, pain been inflicted
If I go out, it won't be pretty like Manet had depicted
Can I stay cool and calm
As the face of a river that's tryna steal a kiss?
Sink or swim, everything is second-guessed
Tears are wept, dreams are nixed
Strenuous to spread my wings
Stretches missed, records skipped
Past events reassessed, recontextualized
Get the gauze, I bled a lot
Picking petals off, will they forget me, forget-me-not
Melting clocks, I don't know the time, it's a slow decline
Codified the best-laid plans, still go awry
Used to walk 'round tall towers for long hours
Couldn't talk 'bout it, not sprouting, was wallflower
Uh, the reason sound like conjecture, sound like projection
Meanwhile, everybody else has found they collective
Rapture's horns sound like lounge in the distance
In a spiral, peep how viral the death is
Maybe this bout of depression how gout for the kings is
Turns out the crown was the litmus
When he drown, who wound up a witness?
You had your doubts in me, did you?

Burning the midnight oil, it don't cease
Not in the least, Vans with the sun make the cipher complete
Autumn gives me chills, send me back to times I was crying, bereaved
I was eighteen on the edge trying to leave
Do things change if it's marks left like a specter?
Felt like the dice loaded against me, tryna get it together
Every storm weathered, looking at the comp like the bigger the better
In the end, they handing it to me like provisional credit
Luxury buildings being built in the ghetto
What a gift from them devils who jockeying for politics
See, my body temp the only thing 'bout me that's moderate
I'm of special interest, don't think that my steelo lobbyist
Hear the flames on a track like a Weezy lighter flick
Feast your eyes on this, flowing with this stream of consciousness
It's nice lines, but if the feeling not in it
Then we don't vibe with it, not even a teeny tiny bit
These rappers hot for a year, enter they terrible twos
Tell you the truth, don't let these Pepe Le Pews get in the booth
Here's a message for you, yes men in your group
Don't pick a bone with me, I am my own skeleton crew
Tell me, what you get when you mix the yellow and blue?
Everything costing an arm, leg, and a tooth
Prophets making predictable moves
For a profit but they want you to step in their shoes
One percent bending the rules
Any rhetoric used defending them dudes diffused and dismissed
We wishing fascists loosen they grip
Fluctuating mood while the news fill the room with gloom
Even if I ride a high, depression loom in the wings
The feeling bittersweet, can't take pleasure in the things I speak
In the end, will my swan song be a symphony?
Take me back to Enemy, 2017
Head in the clouds, we living blissfully, relative ecstasy