I Don't Sing My Songs

I stay inside, I call my dad, I wait to feel
I work my jobs, I don't sing my songs, I pay my bills
I have a salsa jar of cash and I take a long bath to get my legs back
And I take the money and I do my laundry
I don't sing my songs

Then she comes home from work
I watch her red brown hair come down
Some days she's the only good thing

And now all I ever think about is money
So I won't lean into all that I'm avoiding

I used to be so grateful I used to be so kind
With my nose down in a bible each morning and night
I guess I thought if I felt good
It would all work out like it should
But now there's nothing I don't doubt
And I don't sing my songs

I miss everything about anything I had before now
The brick, and the river, and the Florida clouds at sundown
I didn't know I was happy

And all I ever wanted is to sing
But if I do what I want will you even hear me?
But I know that good feelings
Are so possible within me