Hate Me

I'm living in a nightmare
Everyday is heavy with despair
And the more I wait the worse it gets
But will the weight make me not care
If I spill my guts
Will you catch them
Fore' they hit the floor
Probably not
Cus' it's not a long shot
You won't love me anymore
Even if I say it
You won't listen anyway
You'll say it's just a phase
You'll give me a headache
You'll think I don't know what I'm saying
But I finally know who I am

I got a lot to say
But that's a lot of wasted breath to take
Not talking makes me fake
Cus' I know I'm gunna lose you either way
This would just give you a real reason to hate me
Maybe it's for the best
I don't need you to save me
Wishing I could find myself
Wish I could let it out
Wish I could be someone else
Not be filled with this doubt
You say you'll be here
But I know you're lying
Cus where are you
When I'm alone crying

I can feel my bridges burning
It's the real me you don't like
And you'd think that I'd be hurting
But I've held this breath in my whole life
This could be let go
And if would free me in one night
So if I can't let it go
I might as well let my dreams die
And I can't let you take that from me
I don't have to care what you think
My happiness is all I wanna see
I'd show you what is underneath
But you'll say I don't know what I'm saying
You'll try to force me to go into hiding

I got a lot to say
But that's a lot of wasted breath to take
Not talking makes me fake
Cus' I know I'm gunna lose you either way
This would just give you a real reason to hate me
Maybe it's for the best
I don't need you to save me
Wishing I could find myself
Wish I could let it out
Wish I could be someone else
Not be filled with this doubt
You say you'll be here
But I know you're lying
Cus where are you
When I'm alone crying

I got a lot to say
But that's a lot of wasted breath to take
Not talking makes me fake
Cus' I know I'm gunna lose you either way
This would just give you a real reason to hate me
Maybe it's for the best
I don't need you to save me
Wishing I could find myself
Wish I could just let it out
Wish I could be someone else
Not be filled with this doubt
You say you'll be here
But I know you're lying
Cus where are you
When I'm alone crying

I don't have no more time
I'm falling far behind
If I wait for you to see
Then I'll never get to be me
Guess I'll take my chances
And I'll take all consequences
Cus as far as I'm concerned
Life's about making messes