Clown Baby

Look down on me, I don't care anymore
You don't know me, only stories
Nowadays, people portray their face in two completely different ways
I don't know you but that's okay because I don't want to
No games and no fucking excuse
The endless days of abuse have me so used to being used
Looking back it was all that I knew
So it makes sense why I trusted you

You think I didn't know
You were listening so close
Not to sympathize but to solidify your roll
Step by step following the ghost
On your pedestal but you wanted the throne

Narcissistic jealousy is all that I ever see
So obsessed with being seen
No matter what it means

Look at me
Look at me
Another clown baby
Not a thought left to think
Just another, just another slave to the screen

If I carve my heart out of my chest
Pour my soul onto the floor
And sacrifice this vessel
Then will they remember me?

How many blades can one spine take?
Before trust doesn't just break
But all

Falls apart
Descending into never-ending dark
Sworn to solitude
Thoughts I can't exclude

And for all of what you have done to me
I would like to say, "Thank you"

Without the way, you would spit in my face
And portray my name as if I was to blame
For the faults of your own, I suffered alone
But it let me know all I do is grow