Trigger Warning

Alert! This is a trigger warning! Alert!

After careful examination and review by the
Trigger Warning Society of America
This album has been determined to contain a
Litany of words and topics that may cause offense or anxiety

Please confirm that you will not be affected by the mention or
Lengthy discussion of the following topics before
Proceeding with your enjoyment of this album, for
Their reference and abundance are boundless

Murder, robbery, sexual assault, depression
Starvation, sickness, castration, disembowelment
Bodily fluids including but not limited to
Blood, bile, tears, and semen
Political assassinations, homophobia, transphobia, heterophobia
Racism, sexism, feminism, peanut allergy
Pollen allergy, the common cold, sore throat
Runny nose, tripping on your own shoelace
Getting a brain freeze
Smelling something gross when you weren't expecting it
Biting your own tongue on accident, biting your tongue on purpose
Finding ten dollars in your pocket but then you suddenly die

Black people, white people, Chinese people
People who say "Oriental", People who say you shouldn't say "Oriental"
Animal abuse, drug abuse, gang violence
Temporary tattoos, cotton candy, John Candy
Steve Martin, planes, trains, automobiles
Newborn babies, slightly older babies
The concept of death, the Berlin Wall
A big pile of rocks, your grandma having sex with your dad
A tiger with human legs and it can't bite so you become
Friends with it and take it to your seventh grade gym class and
Everyone makes fun of you and you're embarrassed
But it's OK because you have a tiger
Dane Cook, Dana Carvey, Dana Kuehr
That was a girl I used to date in high school

And suicide, thank you! Bye!