Champagne

Champagne in the kitchen, not because I bought it
But because I'm crashing an apartment and somebody left it open
So I poured it in a cup, drank it up
I got the devil in my head but angels swimming in my blood
Plus the conscience of my dead dad
Plus my living mama, plus my other father who raised me not to be sad
And my brother who says that he worries 'bout me from my songs
And my sister who's been living like a saint for so damn long

While I, while I, -cking sinning 'til the lights come up
And the mics catch us saying sh- that we never really meant
Crew wears all black stuff
But we all act like we're so different
But everybody bleeds, right?
Everybody's waiting for their phone to ring
Yeah, everybody seems fine
But everybody's got pieces missing

At minimum, I'd like a little medicine
To make me feel like everything diminishing the venom
That been harshing all my mellows
I'm continuing to fight against the sentiment that make me want to die
In a world full of uptight gentlemen
I want to find a boy smelling like sweet cinnamon
To quote some Tennyson while we take Benadryl
To make my head a bit extra light

I feel it, I want it, I need it, I love it
I'm looking for something to make me feel nothing
I feel it, I want it, I need it, I love it
I'm looking for something to make me feel nothing

Driving through the bay, pray for understanding
I'll be silent for a day, wait until I vanish
And I'm fighting for a break, vacant kind of passion
Never really can account for all the ways in which I've acted
Tried to call my daddy, but, but he's been gone a decade
So I'm drinking like an addict 'til I'm f- with a headache
Happiness sporadic, so I'm crying on a Wednesday
Not, not trying to be combative, but I'm dealing with some dead weight

Verbalize the hurt inside, make me wanna burn alive
My heart was never broken, it was circumcised