Punching Bag

You were always so critical of everything I did
I was really gettin' sick of being talked to like a little kid
When we asked you to build both of the queen size beds
You just grunted and sulked, then you grabbed the tools
You always forced yourself to help

You were never that excited when I came home from a trip
I always greeted you like an excited little puppy, it was sick
We had dinner at your friends'
We had beers, and I made small talk with the girls
You said that's what you wanted
Don't you see that we live in a wider world?

I went to a concert to distract me from my mind
And I sat with my sister with the light drained from eyes
All I wanted was to hold your hand, I wanted to go back to the plan
But do you remember Jade Bird? It could've been any band
Because I cried the whole damn night into my sweaty cotton mask
I asked you what you were feeling and I shouldn't have
Because you sunk into it, used like me like a punching bag

I guess I shouldn't have read your journal but I did
Yea that one that I bought you because you needed it
You wrote you were afraid of losing your partner and you did
I never listened when you said you were selfish

I went to a concert to distract me from my mind
And I sat with my sister with the light drained from eyes
All I wanted was to hold your hand, I wanted to go back to the plan
But do you remember Jade Bird? It could've been any band
Because I cried the whole damn night into my sweaty cotton mask
I asked you what you were feeling and I shouldn't have
Because you sunk into it, used like me like a punching bag

But you were always something to look forward to - I adored you

I tried to make myself quieter for you
I tried to get a little smaller for you
I wish I could have been shyer for you
I wish I could've been a liar for you
But the things that made me fall for you, boo
Are the things that made you small for me, too
My confidence with your solitude
We were never gonna sing the same tune
And if you hadn't been so mean to me soon
I would have never ever left, that's for true
If it had ended any better than that
It was never gonna end

I tried to make myself quieter for you
I tried to get a little smaller for you
I wish I could have been shyer for you
I wish I could've been a liar for you
But the things that made you fall for me, boo
Are the things that made you small for me, too
My confidence with your solitude
We were never gonna sing the same tune
And if you hadn't been so mean to me soon
I would have never ever left, that's for true
If it had ended any better than that
It was never gonna end

But do you remember Jade Bird? It could've been any band
Because I cried the whole damn night into my sweaty cotton mask
I asked you what you were feeling and I shouldn't have
Because you sunk into it, used like me like a punching bag