Grandma

I drop the pieces on the floor, and they wait to be solved
In between flow the hard times I face on the job
And my thoughts like a cleaner that I spray and see fog
And it all goes in the mix as I patiently jot
Pianissimo should come, but it's basically not
Feeling empty like the two peas would vacate the pot
It's geometry of this heart that I hastily drop
And, it falls straight to the ground with no angles involved
So how am I supposed to feel here now that you're gone
It broke my heart to pieces like a powerful song
And, I racked half of my brain trying to write the pain which it feels
The other half saying "is it real"
Cause it doesn't feel like the news I'm supposed to be hearing
My emotions are bottled up like a potion endearing
To take away the mental fog in this poetry clearing
Where images of myself are approaching me tearing
Each holding some of the heart that had shattered before
Upon seeing this, I run to the pasture for sure
Even though it's in my head, if you're at rest
I'll put these flowers on your bed, don't you battle no more
I know inside that I've got to
And, wanting to hide as I tried, I see the future like a Xatu
It follows my stride across the land
It won't understand it wasn't planned
I'm unable to cry much as I want to
My sanity calls reality like "can it be lighter"
Cause it struck me like a fighter, handily
But it's just as I feared
Pianissimo is here to unlock my tears with piano keys
They fall about and form a path to my heart like an order route
I keep it in the music box, never call it out
The tears clean the kitchen floor where my breath failed
And I'm just hoping that you rest well

This is definitely the hardest song I've ever written
I cried the whole time while I was writing it
I cried the week before
Cried while I was making the beat
Just wasn't ready to let go
I feel like you're never really ready
To hear the news that someone passed away
However
When I attended the funeral
And I saw her looking really peaceful in the casket
I thought to myself
"Wow, she's not hurting anymore"
She's at rest
So, ultimately I can take solace in that
Goodnight grandma
Rest in peace