4C

The photos of the last three years are fading
I can paint the scene
It's always me my luck is tainted
Wasting time on white sheets
Tell me is it luck that I'm alive
But I've lost my dreams
Or should I've given up on life
Without living half of it
Even the irrational decisions add up pieces to the story
I don't want to make revisions life is too long to be sorry

I'm riding and it's freezing
Cause my chest is cut right open
My subconscious keeps on leaking in my soul
So here's to hoping
It don't matter that we kiss I even cheat on my death
Scars on my body for three months that I was left on the self
Back in the days where I couldn't take a piss by myself
Changing my appearance and I shaved my head
Like Britney
Burning all my bridges cause I know
There is no sympathy
And I spent it all on Saturday
I could've died on Sunday

I don't care about the future
I don't care about you
All I care about
Is to get high somehow
So I can forget about you
I don't care about the future
I don't care about you
All I care about
Is to get high somehow
So I can forget about you
So tell me why I saw you again last night
After a whole damn year
Where you really there
Or was the blow inside of me
Show me my greatest fear
I'm living like a dreamer but I'm stuck inside this house
Housing all the voices
Telling me what to do again
Self destructing is cathartic
Therapy is repetitive
I know they say they love me but
My trust is always negative

Keep my suits for funerals not award shows
Skeletons and my fears in the wardrobe
Tattoos like the ink in my notebook
I took them shots
And I don't care if I crush now
Are you ok with the fact I self destruct when I'm happy
I almost died hold me tight I left my blood on your jacket
I know you want to see me
But I'm busy making bad decisions
Ruining our relationship
I know that I'm the only reason
Say we're better off alone
Say you hate I'm never home
I always drink when you're around
I know that this is over
I'm sorry that I'm insecure
Can't face you when I'm sober
Everyitme I look at you I want to run for cover
But every time I look at you I know this isn't over

I don't care about the future
I don't care about you
All I care about
Is to get high somehow
So I can forget about you
I don't care about the future
I don't care about you
All I care about
Is to get high somehow
So I can forget about you
So tell me why I saw you again last night
After a whole damn year
Where you really there
Or was the blow inside of me
Show me my greatest fear
I'm living like a dreamer but I'm stuck inside this house
Housing all the voices
Telling me what to do again
Self destructing is cathartic
Therapy is repetitive
I know they say they love me but
My trust is always negative