Catharsis

I

Never really wanted to do this, but screw it
The music is food to my mood and if you think
It's stupid then you don't know the good it can
Do to let loose and reduce all the fumes
Accumulatin' under the hood
Cus the truth is if I don't sluice 'em then
Sooner or later my inner Lucifer's using the bottled
Up fury to bruise and consume me, showin' a side
Of me that you never knew, G, cus I've been
Hiding him 'till I found a way to make him shine
And finally rhymin' is the right environment to
Let him out again

Probably now you realizin' why I'm always smilin'
Around you man, I'm leaving all the violence
With the violins and the violins in the studio
Arranging the funeral of all the commoners who
Be judging my common sense in the comments section
Got me wonderin' why I'm never seein' compliments
Must be tied in with the fact these people positive
And too pre-occupied to waste their time on that

See I could think that I ain't dominant, but I'm
Choosin' to acknowledge that the problem isn't
On my part in this

You won't ever get a pardon for the bars I spit
You probably got better odds to win the lotto kid
So I'll keep mining my mind for them diamonds
Clearing it out in the process, and if I sound like a
Prophet who lost it like Nostradamus it's a sign of
Exhaust in the pipe or the faucet of negative thoughts
And I tossed it out of my top

See I don't drip I just drop, I keep to myself when I jot
Already got a good job and a hot lady to shop with
I never did it for winnin' the pot or gettin' the props
I never came here to conquer

I ain't waitin' for no agency sponsor, wavin' their
Fake and cheap promises, sayin' they'll make me a star
Cus that ain't why I'm breaking these bars, bruh

I'm just givin' space to the monsters, facilitatin'
Change in my posture, layer by layer
Like makin' lasagna, and it's makin' me prosper
I'm still paving the way that I wander, and I pray
I don't lose my sanity when I conjure my demons
But ain't no way I'm gon' stop it!

And I ain't claimin' I'll make it or take my place
With the greatest, but at least I can say that I gave it my all
On the way to my grave, and if somewhere along the way
I'm placed in your playlist or givin' a couple solar rays to
Your day I'll be leavin' this plane with a gracious smile on
My face, cus that's the reason I'm living, I'm a strong believer
In giving a bit of positivity to my kin and teach 'em the process
Of releasin' the demon within in a custom fitted arena
Lettin' him feed on his needs for a minute

Believe me, I do it extremely, when I'm spitting' over beats
And I feel recharged everytime I'm droppin' bars cus I
Blew off all my steam, key meaning is to temper your
Temper like hardened steel with a hammer suiting all
Your needs, G, You're the smith and the sword you forge
Is an analogy for your personality and no one can tell you
Your blade is a fallacy cus if it cuts it for you

You've become the master of sanity, you've combatted your
Demons and addressed the matter at hand to be able to handle
And wield it for better, and that is the path towards
Better achievement

And if you made it, congratulations
Just remember that even the sharpest of swords go dull
If ignored, you gotta maintain it, put in effort to clean it
And keep it from fadin' away into memory cus the minute you
Think that you mastered your demons and eliminate the space
That they need they'll be breathin' over your shoulders to claim it
See there's there's no way to hold 'em in cages
Only way to control 'em is free 'em

In a controlled environment, open up to that side of your mind
And let it define itself, cus whether or not you deny it
That side is residing inside of you so you have to allow it in or
Battle through life missing half of your power man

So this is my vow I'mma harness my demons, leavin' carnage
On beats but keeping the calmest demeanor when crossin'
The street or any other form of normalcy, feelin' reborn
Like a phoenix, from the bottom of my heart I be speaking
Not keepin' any cards up my sleeve, man I'mma leave it all
On the sheet

Cus ever since I started to speak up I've been feelin'
Sorta relieved, like I no longer need to shoulder this
Enormous boulder I keep in the deepest corners and reaches
Of my dome and I mean that

Rap has given form to my demons and they be roamin' the beat
Like the headless horseman or dementors or boogeyman, they used to
Torture my being until I forced 'em to forfeit their needs and conform
To me leakin' em proportionately through a chorus or scheme in the
Form of mischievous and horrible scenes resultin' in all of you seein'
A deplorable meanie when I'm stormin' the beat in the form of a demon

Kinda comical cus all I'm tryin' to do is acknowledge the unstoppable
Diabolical, volatile, insurmountably astronomical power in my thoughts
When I'm jottin' notes

I mean why am I even bothered to provoke a thought with you impossible
Idiotically simple-minded, shortsighted bunch always tryin' to go the
Opposite side of your problems, fool?
Ok stop it, that's not my crime to solve, I found my catharsis
I'm not Forcin' it down your throat