I Feel

I feel sick
My organs bob about in the dark
In a mustard mist, in my stomach vase
Barely connected by the tubes, but it's dark
In my eggshell

If it were a baby, I'd name her Angst
And hold her tight in my chest
And she'd grow, from a small, hard stone
Into my own, a problem my own
That would disease everything and everyone

When I birthed her, I birthed her red
And when I met her, I cried the Styx for her
And she came out crimson, on the bathroom floor
With her baby weight, she kept me down
On the blue linoleum, hmm

She tortured me still
With the darkest despair, for what felt like forever and ever
And she pulled on my hair, and whispered in my ear
"You fucking love, you love to fuck, to fuck it up"
Fucking listen to her sing

This red cord, the baby grabbed the lump in my throat
And pulled the cord, "This is wild" she said
This is it, this is madness, don't you love it?
A lot's gonna change, well hear it, better believe it
Let it sink in, as his Titanic rises
And the sun streams in
You're here hard on the floor

Behind the locked door
And I'm ringed around your neck
He thinks you float
But you don't