A Billion Seconds

If I have a billion seconds left to live
A billion seconds of my life left to give
I turn seventy one in thirty one years
Left of joy, celebration, some tears, some fears

Only thirty one years, so much more than half done
I won't live forever, death cannot be outrun
That's fun, immortality is overrated
Better missed and celebrated, than persist and be hated

I hope to grow old, already brown and gifted
I need no gold, nor renown, I've drifted
Let things unfold, unbound, untwisted
Uncontrolled, I've found and since insisted

That time is all I have to call my own
That all I chased before, I've since outgrown
Now I stop and smell flowers on paths unknown
Grab every wisp of delight, I will not postpone

No, a billion seconds makes me filled with bliss
I'll never own a billion of anything but this
Time no longer spent staring into the abyss
No more squandering, holding on to every bit

I consume and share less, I contemplate
Fewer needs, less chase, open heart, embrace
More love, more peace, subjugate all my hate
Relegate, let it be, do not resuscitate

Instead of criticising, I choose to create
Instead of tearing down, try to build something great
Even if I fail, I'm never ever stressing
I've been so blessed, I try being a blessing

I find the power to let power go
My mind uncovered, the courage to say no
Take it all away, I still have everything left
Make the best of my time, find time for the best

I'm done chasing cars, catch me splitting bars
Life is never ever sparse when I look up to the stars
From trivial thoughts, I'll tender resignation
I will not lead a life of quiet desperation

I remember I can leave my life right now
I make sure I get to live my life right now
It's up to me, I must always allow
Myself a lot more time somehow

Yes, my life is ending, it's working as intended
Second by second by second by second
It pushes, it rushes, breaks all the speeding laws
That's exactly why on this track I don't pause

Between two eternities I toe a fine line
My vast past flew by so fast it has been left behind
My future so unsure, it's yet to be defined
All I have is my now, now I'm in the nick of time

Killing time today can kill my soul tomorrow
Without delays I keep at bay my regrets, my sorrows
I'm put to test every day Yet I will not forget
Eternities are brilliant when each moment gets my best

I stop wasting my life I start appreciating
No more existing I have to start living
I don't procrastinate, I just do. Amen
I will not live through yesterday yet again

I view my world vividly through a painter's eyes
Feel all of those feelings that make poets sigh
I'm quick to feel cheer on the edge of a smile
My wonder, sincere. I'm pleasantly surprised

The candle of my vision is now forever lit
Its brightness so inspiring, too legit to quit
I scout for doors to open in the walls of my mind
I discover new tools take all the goodness I can find

My tools are not trophies bright and shiny on display
I use them, they grow me they remind me every day
That conditions for a lifetime of supply guaranteed
Are that I strive to find the time and use them consistently

I love the time I spend immersed and lost in a book
I love the time I slow things down to take a second look
I love my journey on every station, every track
I love my time with words, they always have my back

I don't make my words, my words they make me
From darkness to light, my words they take me
From water, from mud, they mould, they shape me
Like perfect imperfections, they give you all of me

Time is an ingredient for all that's imperfect
I'm okay being reliant on just giving it my best
Not infinity, a few million seconds left
No control, none at all of how much I possess

I confess that when I pause, no more distress
Yes, I can just be to me, that is success
I'll stop for now, look around delightfully reflect
I'll take a bow, my track is done. Look out for what is next