This is Not How it Ends

I can smell the mold
It's in the walls of this new apartment
That I left here
Brush my hand across another notch
That I left here in this stand
My back's got a story to tell
There's a narrative in my posture
It's writing letters and they're telling me
To get the hell out
They're telling me to get out
And that I've wasted another month
This seasons littered with rent checks piled next to my thoughts
Dead like the leaves on the ground

I'm not gonna let December drag me under again
Not gonna run away run away
I need to breathe life before I decay

Watching the sunrise on another day
Spent in flickering white scales lights
They're burning down on me
And tying my shadow to an inward facing window
I can barely breathe
With the clocks face glaring at me
An opponent across the ring
Every minute it's shaking it's hands
Beating me senseless
I'm wishing it was over while missing my bruises

How did we ever make a cyclical hell
The knot of a lifeline
Or am I just wasting mine?

I'm not gonna let December drag me under again
Not gonna run away run away
I need to breathe life before I decay
I'm not gonna let December drag me under again
Not gonna run away run away
I need to breathe life before I decay

I'm not gonna let December drag me under again
Not gonna run away run away
I need to breathe life before I decay
(For once I will not be my reason for pain)
(For once I will not be my reason for pain)
I decay
(For once I will not be my reason for pain)
(For once I will not be my reason for pain)
Decay
(For once I will not be my reason for pain)
(For once I will not be my reason for pain)
Decay
(For once I will not be my reason for pain)
For pain