What Ifs

I raised two whole kids on my own
Three whole years mane look how they've grown
Both of them my heart and heart is my home
I don't wanna give all this up for my hopes
I been thinking mo' 'bout what l let go
What if I miss my one chance to blow
What if I leave and then die on the road
I don't wanna do my kids like Coco
What if I hate myself when I'm old
Cause I let my fears take over my goals
How will I live when I lose my flow and I can't write a song no mo'

Uh
Raising the babies nigga I gave an eighth to the baby sitter
Hmm ain't no mo faking nigga
Y'all only stayed cause I'm wavy nigga
Hmm I keep it cool hop in the booth
All on the booze dropping off gems
Looking like oops I came to win
Not scared to lose I'm looking at you
With all of my fears when everything clears
All I'ma have is me and the mirror
Using lyrics as my therapy and hopefully career
And I say hopefully cause I just made my first album this year
People close to me know I been taking too long to move forward
My niggas put a big chip on my shoulder ain't no grower
I presented them with opportunities and they ain't show up
Then resented them for what won't meant to be and then we broke up
What if I ain't never started bragging calling myself "captain"
Because I had the drive to make them open mics happen
What if I had just set niggas free and never tatted VArsity?
What if I went on my own where the fuck would all us be?

But I can't keep on living my life on what ifs
I just gotta moooooooove
Yeah
If I everything was over and ended right here
What did I doooooooo?
Yeah

Life is just a maze with your perspective
When I met Tezlaspdez that won't his name
In fact I think I was 'bout eight
He best friends with my little cousin JP I'm in second grade
I'm a bully told JP anybody step to him and his best friend
Then I'ma step in I'ma make they fucking head spin
His best friend name was Aaron by my standards Aaron was a sweet kid
Could tell that he ain't never seen the fights as I did
Fast forward I'm seventeen my rap dreams began to bloom
I'm battling the niggas who be banging after school
Somebody told me I had bars and ain't have shit to listen to
That was the day that I decided I needed to find a booth
I heard about nigga named Black Ace who lived out Fran Way
And I had no idea God was looking at us that day
I hopped up on the HRT and got off by the Captain Ds
And walked up the crib left of the fork in the street and it was Aaron
The first time recorded with that nigga I was embarrassed
He knew way more mixing than me but he was sharing
All the information I would later need
He don't know that he the reason I'm so good at reading beats
We made our first song called Fast Lane it was garbage
But we felt accomplished that's when I knew I found my calling
To be honest I look back and I realize I'm the problem
The fact that niggas even fucked with me I'm still astonished
We moved into the basement music making waking baking
Mixtapes breaking every microphone I put my hands on
My ego would seem bigger if saw me 'round my nigga
You feel taller when you have some shoulders you can stand on
What if I had let that ego go and let Aaron be captain?
What if he ain't never lose our songs when everything start crashing?
What if I chose somebody else's crib to do my rapping?
Would both of us been better off if none of this shit happened my nigga?
Hmm

But I can't keep on living my life on what ifs
I just gotta moooooooove
Yeah
If I everything was over and ended right here
What did I doooooooo
Yeah

Rest in peace Ralph
Long Live Aunt Lisa

I raised two whole kids on my own
Three whole years mane look how they've grown
Both of them my heart and heart is my home
I don't wanna give all this up for my hopes
I been thinking mo' 'bout what l let go
What if I miss my one chance to blow
What if I leave and then die on the road
I don't wanna do my kids like Coco
What if I hate myself when I'm old
Cause I let my fears take over my goals
How will I live when I lose my flow and I can't write a song no mo'