Somnambulist

Afternoon evening eternal
Heart like a fist in my chest
To be honest I'm almost nocturnal
To be honest I need some rest

A gold and blue halo surrounds me
I fall to the back of my mind
A subtle suggestion confounds me:
I'm on my way home but I'm just along for the ride

To and away from the city
The ebb and the flow of the tide
All of a sudden it hits me
I've planned out a small suicide

I thought that the world might be ending
And then I thought maybe just me
But I see no use in pretending
That the ending is all that I see

I get home quarter past five
And I'm not alive
But I'll never die
I'll just be reborn
A drop in a storm
Condense and reform
Rinse and repeat
But never again
'Cause every song ends
And I can't pretend
I'm tired of singing these same songs
Why can't I be done
And write for the sun
And not for what's gone?
When nothing's to come
All that remains is more of the same
But I want to change
I want to be
I want to be
I want to be
More than an epitaph
More than a funeral dirge
More than a polygraph
More than the sum of my parts
More than my bleeding heart
More than my mind
More than a satellite
More than a star

I want to be.