Polluted

Fluidity is defined as the quality of being likely
To change repeatedly and unexpectedly

Just a lil kid, put in another box
Assigned as "female" cause i got a box
Remember feeling different, but how could i explain
School don't teach you that these feelings got a name

They say it's pink and blue
That's the only two
But i feel purple too, it's nothing new
They call it crazy, but i know the truth now
It's all a spectrum, why settle for breadcrumbs

That's how it is in the land of the unfree
Home of the brainwashed and the white washed
They keep the lights off, so we stay in the dark
Now i'm on night watch

Insecure lil girl
With a tendency to please
Pretty shitty combo when i'm only a teen
That's what they want, they love compliancy
Fuck what they want, i hate when men be eyeing me

Insecure lil girl, it's you against the world
They say be yourself, then say you need help
That shit is mad confusing
They still polluting young minds, it feels like we running out of time

Just a teen girl, already in a pattern
Seeking out attention from men that didn't matter
Remember feeling broken, but how could i explain
Society been teaching me that i should feel ashamed

Nights spent crying in the dark
Scars still living in my heart
Who would i be if i never went thru this
Is the damage as deep as the root is

Insecure lil girl
I know you're conflicted
If it's wrong then why is it addictive
Solace in a substance, comfort in the numbness
If it's right then why am i reluctant

Insecure lil girl, it's you against the world
They say be yourself, then say you need help
That shit is mad confusing
They still polluting young minds, it feels like we running out of time

Now i'm just a person, fluid in my set up
3 more years till the pre frontal's developed
Processing the past, journaling reflections
Talked about my feelings during my weekly sessions

I'm not weak, i'm strengthened, thought i should mention
Had to reach inside & realize i need help then
I went & i got some
Tend the seed to blossom
Let go of the pain but the lessons not forgot on

These men would hate on my body (like what)
But now they saying they want me (shut up)
The old me woulda folded but the new me knows i'm golden
I'm precious & protected, they jealous & eroded

Insecure lil girl
I see how much you've grown
Healing everyday, caring for your own
Feeling like a boy, depending on the day
Living out your truth, fuck what anybody say

Insecure lil girl, it's you against the world
They say be yourself, then say you need help
That shit is mad confusing
They still polluting young minds, it feels like we running out of time

To all the politicians that wanna erase us
No amount of laws will ever get rid of us
To all the preachers that hate us
No amount of prayer will heal the "sin" in us

Now i'm just a person, fluid in my set up
People get confused, some of them get fed up
They want me to choose, they think i'm messed up
They can stay mad, i keep my head up
And my bread up, so stay fed up
I'ma stay myself & you can stay fed up, bitch
T L G B Q I A plus, we here to stay
Yea i put the T first
Liyah Allure i'm a girl i'm a boy
Sometimes i feel like both and sometimes i'm neither