Uzumaki

My hopes
And dreams they leave me wanting more
But I can't escape the feeling that no
Matter what I do I'm marching in tow
Hoping that my vessel will float
And I know that
I'm running up a ladder
That's been nailed to the ground
Even so
I feel like another path may
Be just too far gone to be found
But if I don't want anything
I just might be ok after all

I've been trying to pay attention
Just long enough to hear you mention
The things you've been wanting to say
For weeks or months or days
While I've been grasping for motivation
I find it rough when every day's been
A new door leading into
Copies of the same old room

I'm spinning faster, a spiral disaster
A vortex pulling me down
Face like asters, asphyxiate me now
I look back after at all our laughter
And when it suddenly drowned
To detach her mutilate me now

The more I look at my life the less I'm ever surprised
That the line that kept me going was no more than a lie
I made up to keep me thinking I was more than this guy
With a knife to his wrist who's only fate is to die
I remember back then when I thought I could fly
If I could pick the right path, aim, and shoot for the sky
Every night I lay awake and think of ways to find
Inside myself, the me that's good enough, but was I?

Now I'm
Spinning faster, a spiral disaster
A vortex pulling me down
Face like asters, asphyxiate me now
I look back after at all our laughter
And when it suddenly drowned
To detach her mutilate me now

My hopes
And dreams they leave me wanting more
But I can't escape the feeling that no
Matter what I do I'm marching in tow
Hoping that my vessel will float
And I know that
I'm running up a ladder
That's been nailed to the ground
Even so
I feel like another path may
Be just too far gone to be found
But if I don't want anything
I just might be ok after all