Everything You Didn't Want to Hear

I could never date you because I'd slowly grow to hate you
But I'll progress around the circle just to keep you in my arms
Advertise myself as grateful and considerate, but that's toxic
And it won't exonerate me of my shortcomings at all

She was lying
Miles hasn't climbed a tree in years
Rather party in the airplane than write odes or other art

And I'm dying
Tranquilize me with complacency
Replacing all the holy nectar leaking from my heart

"Eli, why'd you do it? Why'd you take down all your music?"
I'll admit, it was a misstep trying not to be perceived
And yet, I don't deserve the twenty strings and thirteen wires
Living with me in my bedroom, at least that's what I belive

She was lying
Miles sleeps since January
Beating off, redownload Tinder, this was fucked up from the start

And I'm dying
Tranquilize me with complacency
Replacing all the holy nectar leaking from my heart

Everything that I touch turns to dust
Can't find a better way to say it's corpses to the ground
Keep building your life inside a shell of skulls
But tell me how to keep on living when myself I haven't found

She was lying
And Miles was the victim
"Oh, I'm so sad," shut up, fucker, yeah, you really played the part

And I'm dying
Tranquilize me with complacency
Replacing all the holy nectar leaking from my heart

I want to make something
I want meaning
I want to fuck up
I want meaning
I want to learn alive
I want meaning
I want me
I want meaning

And it's a shame (you know, from which I derive sexual pleasure)
I couldn't talk you down from conceited entitlement
And I'm crying, as the curtains close again
I'll renounce all that I've said to make amends