Scars of Youth: Chapter 1 - Absent Father

I can't get over you
You showed up so out of the blue
Bright love, red stains in my view
Blinded by the pink hearts that I once drew
That I once knew (yeah) this song is overdue
Young love in my face and I couldn't see the value
Show me how to love, I guess I forgot
Show me how to trust 'cause baby, I forgot
And I feel so damn stupid when you put me on the spot
Give me a brand new cupid 'cause mine got shot
Show me how to cry, 'cause I've never learned
Show me how to fly, I'll promise I'll return
When the daylight's gone and there's fog around
I'll be back from the dead like I came around
You showed me how to trust, I broke your heart in December
It was raining heavily, the day was looking kinda slender
I don't know if you cried and really I cannot remember
I guess I just didn't care enough or maybe I'm self-centered
And I'm trying to be better but I keep on messing up
Fuck it, I sound like my dad and now I feel like throwing up
And all the memories they keep on coming back
I think I might just get drunk and fuck up just like my fucking dad
Show me how to love, I guess I forgot
Show me how to trust 'cause baby, I forgot
And I feel so damn stupid when you put me on the spot
Give me a brand new cupid 'cause mine got shot
Show me how to cry, 'cause I've never learned
Show me how to fly, I'll promise I'll return
When the daylight's gone and there's fog around
I'll be back from the dead like I came around
"What the fuck?"
"I just hoped someday someone would love me"
"Talk to me"
"It gotta be that way with me"
"Don't speak"
'Cause I have only loved one man and I got a
Hunch that I'm never gonna settle with no other guy"
When I was young, I always dreamt of somebody that could
Come and love me the same way I love myself
But I guess that I actually never loved myself, I never learned how
I mean, I always had affection from my family, except from my dad
And I wonder if my early inability to show my feelings for someone
Came from my dad's inability to show
Any source of remorse for his shitty actions
And I guess it's easy to blame him for every problem
That I ever had in my life, but I really do believe that
So fuck you, I hope you die alone