The Longest Song For the One I've Loved the Longest

In one lifetime
One has many lovers
One after the other
Some all at once (ooo)

Ooo let me tell you about
My lover girl (ooo)
She's the damndest thing
That ever came to me

She is my mirror
Reflecting back to me
Hidden things I should see clearer oh
My shadows my light
The mess in my mind that I hide
She worships all of me
Even the parts worth dismembering
Loving her is remembering

She's my mango baby
Fuck she's my sanctuary
Forget the walls the preacher man
And his hypocrisy
Mmm sanctuary
That's what you are to me

I'm a vampire
At first sight I smelt the love
Running through her blood
(wasn't prepared) Wasn't prepared
She bought the buyer's beware
And entered my lair (entered my lair)
We rolled around like two kids in the dark
Unclear where my body ends and hers starts
Mmm your marinade critically acclaimed
You taste like the old gods (like the old gods oh)
Accolades it's easy to retain
Just how precious you are

She makes me freer
Respecting what it means
To live as our own while together
We compose a life (life)
That's wilder than my state of mind
(than my state of mind)
A dreamer like me
But she's careful see (careful see)
She thinks when I don't necessarily
(what would I do?)
What would I do without baby?

(oh) It's funny hmm
When I look back at who we were
When we first met
I see two completely different people
And somehow through every shift
Every adaptation of self
We grow a new layer of skin (we grow we grow)
And we become even more interwoven
Every layer meets the other and it is good

You like to joke that I could be a cult leader
Your eyes have a shine when I start
Rambling at night you like me eager
Well baby I can do anything as long as
You're a believer

You (can I can I wash my baby clean?)
Still put water in my eyes but
You (can I can I say things I don't mean?)
Couldn't mean to hurt me if you tried
And that's the deviation
Never deliberate just a conversation
You love me just to love me (ooo)
And when we fight you get to know me
It's all information

How curious that who I am now
Wouldn't return to be with old iterations of Her
And I certainly wouldn't revisit
Old revisions of Myself
But how enchanting that those people got to meet
And enjoy each other (how do you do?)
And we keep meeting (how do you do?)
And falling deeper and deeper (I love you I do)
Into devotion to ourselves and one another

It's been five years
Many versions of me died
I lay flowers on their grave
While you stand proudly by my side
But all my iterations love you
More and more it's true
I guess when the lovin's good enough
More good shit accrues
And you are not the same girl
I seduced with apple juice
You shift and shape and I'm just glad
Your layers like me too ha!

You (can I can I wash my baby clean?)
Still put water in my eyes but
You (can I can I say things I don't mean?)
Couldn't mean to hurt me if you tried
And that's the deviation
Never deliberate just a conversation (talk to me baby)
You love me just to love me (you love)
And when we fight you get to know me
It's all information

Five years (ooo)
Sometimes it hits me
That it's been that long
And I kinda wanna throw up a little bit
(yes I do yes I do I love you)
See before her
I had never fully commit myself to anything
Out of fear
Out of restlessness (I am restless)
Doubt (I am full of doubt)
To keep me safe (can she keep me safe?)
To keep meme
But with her I am bare and I am wide open
One day I realized
She doesn't want to capture me
She wants to help me escape
From any path or any thought
That doesn't serve me (can she be my escape?)
And so I stay (I stay I stay)
And I do the same for her

You're a lover I'm a fighter
And I've fought to come a long way (oh yeah)
From running into nothing (into nothing)
I'm so glad that I stayed (so glad I stayed)
Let's take the train the flights are low
I wanna see the world
While I'm at home
We won't start from the beginning
I can love you better in the ninth inning

Sometimes I can't get out of bed
Paralyzed by one thing or another
What do you mean we're all going to die?
What do you mean the system's a guise?
My heart aches sometimes
And she comforts me
Sometimes I can't get out of bed
Unsure if I'll ever recover
What do you mean my money pays for mass slaughter?
(what do you mean? what do you mean?)
What do you mean that mothers brainwash their daughters?
(what do you mean? what do you mean? ohh)
My mind breaks sometimes (my mind breaks)
And she comforts me
And she reminds me
That I'm not crazy (I'm not crazy)
That I feel exactly as one should feel
And she waits with me
Until I get up again

I've got existential thoughts
And so do you
We stay up very late
Connecting all the dots
Think we know a lot
Maybe we do maybe we don't
Though it's nice to dim our dread
Pour the thoughts out of our heads
But I'm sensitive
When I can't get out of bed
Your words hold me by a thread I
I'm trying to tell you
That you make me better
I'm addicted to your body
But it's your mind that makes me wetter
When I'm up on my feet again
We hit the road claim what we're owed
Amen

Amen
You are a prayer
Amen
Oh I do declare
Amen
I love you I swear
Amen

Amen
You are a prayer
Amen
Oh I do declare
Amen
I love you I swear
Amen