Trespasses

Our Father
Dear God, I'm in regret, I'm sorry I existed
This is not a suicide letter I'm just pissed that
I don't have it in me to be the me you insisted
That I be, I could have been, but I missed it
Sometimes intentionally, that's why I'm pissed and
I was tryna be cool, thought trailing you would risk it
Damn
But what do I know
I don't go to church cause I can get judged there
I'm fearful of getting judged cause I think that I am worthless
I don't really wanna boast when I do think of myself less
The soul may be willing, but the flesh is always weak
I could be dead dedicated, willingly or so to speak
I'm sorry, that I'm sorry is the only thing that I could say
I'm sorry that I say sorry before I could fix my mistake
I'm sorry that I don't think I could ever be the perfect me
I'm sorry I'm a waste of creation, I could be a better me
I should fight more, but I just don't know
I should fast more, but I'm just not sure
I should consult more
But I got no words
I should read your word
But I fear I'll get lost
I'm grateful you gave me this life
But at times I wonder why I'm breathing it's like
You gave me a chance to do and be right
But I complicate your words and read too deep
When I should listen

When all is said and done
I realise what I done
I'm sorry
(I'm sorry)
I'm sorry so sorry
(I'm sorry so sorry)
I'm sorry

My sorry ain't an attempt for me to get forgiveness for my acts
I know I can't really get forgiveness that make me understand
So I guess I'm just basically saying, I didn't mean to upset
Wish I made sense to me, I apologize to my peeps
I'm sorry that I lash out
When there's actually more at stake
I'm sorry that I make it seem like you at fault
When you did your best
I'm sadly coming to the realisation that I'm not okay
I'm sorry that I'm always complaining
When I could be, setting me straight
I know y'all did y'all best to provide the best that you ever could
It's not fair to overlook your efforts, man I'm looking human
Know err'body in my life do they best to welcome me but
It's hard for me to feel welcome when I don't
Welcome me
I don't even know how to face God now
Funny that I think he's not expecting me to move a mountain
Know he give me grace but how can I talk to him
What do I say when I haven't even tried
I'm sorry to myself for never giving me a chance
To fully understand myself, I could have made plans
I could have been the best the world has ever seen
As I dribble the mic, could have been on the scene at 18
Damn at 18
I need to talk to God more
Blessed me with a girl now, and she told me
You are not a judge nigga, so don't judge you

When all is said and done
I realise what I done
I'm sorry
(I'm sorry)
I'm sorry so sorry
(I'm sorry so sorry)
I'm sorry
(I'm sorry)