Drink My Calories

Reaching for another as the last one starts to take hold
Fighting for survival in a war I always bring home
Hard to feel much pity when it just comes down to control
Shame I haven't found any on the downward spiral
How can I make good choices if I can barely think
So I take my medication to take me off the brink
I think it's the medicine that's putting me there
But I think I've reached a point where I don't really care

I wanna drink my calories so I'll count 'em
Start to feel my feelings, now I'll drown em
Think I might be better off without em
If I can still feel my body then I must be sober
Pour one out to never getting older
Make this last till the endin of October
To start this cycle again over and over

Reaching for another as the last one starts to fade
Gotta keep the party going, got no time to waste
I'm falling into every trap I've laid along the path
Cause rope feels pretty comfortable around my neck

I wanna drink my calories so I'll count 'em
Start to feel my feelings, now I'll drown em
Think I might be better off without em
If I can still feel my body then I must be sober
Pour one out to never getting older
Make this last till the endin of October
To start this cycle again over and over

Light up the sky as you burn the way home
In a last ditch effort to get control
Searching for a reason in the embers and ash
For why you always thought you could never go back
A false flag attack on a neighboring nation
Turn on everyone you love till no one's left to save ya
Maybe find God in the trenches that you dug
A last plea for forgiveness before you give up