Pants

Next up on Veggie shopping network, "Pants"
Welcome viewers, what comes next
A pair of pants with stripes or checks?
Dig in your wallet, dump out your purse
Who'll be the one to buy the first pair?

You can wear 'em if you're big, you can wear 'em if you're small
They're pants if you're short and shorts if you're tall
You can wear 'em in the spring, you can wear 'em in the fall
They're pants if you're short and shorts if you're tall

Sold five so far, down to 20
Look whatchu get for a little bit of money
Down to your feet and up to your tummy
Pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants
Pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants

If you buy right now tonight
We'll throw in a set of Ginsu knives
A pair of pants could change your life
One easy payment, $9.95

See the tag on the back when your size gets small
They're pants if you're short and shorts if you're tall
You can wear 'em to the farm, you can wear 'em to the mall
They're pants if you're short and shorts if you're tall

16 more, we're down to four!
You can't buy these in any store
They're just like your grandaddy wore
Pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants
Pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants

Pants have six legs less than a squid
It's a verb for a dog and a noun for a kid
With a pair of pants, you're not alone
You can dance with your pants till the cows come home
These pair of pants will win your heart
We accept most credit cards
From stretchy waists to elastic bands
Makes easier buffet eating pants

Tills, slacks, corduroys
Pants bestow a special joy
As seen on the screen of your TV
These pants can hide on cycling needs
There's parrots made of high green vibe
Don't hesitate! All sales are final
To summarize, you might recall

They're pants if you're short and shorts if you're tall
Pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants
Four, three, two, one, going going going gone
We're out of pants, we've gotta run (pants)
You've got some skinny legs (pants)