100 Years

I guess a broken heart heals faster than a broken ego
I don't know who you are but still yearn for who you were not
Who you were not, it's who I made up
I was disrupting the facade
Hence, your anger is my fault
The only way to act with you is not to act at all
I should've kept my mouth shut, it was all my fault

Yet somehow you still dream of love stories and happy endings
But deep down you must know it's not meant for you, in the end
Peace is something you'll spend your whole life looking for
If you keep on draining other people's life force
And you can write all the letters that you want
And I'll keep on writing my truth down in my songs
Remember how excited you were, said you'd never had a writer before
Was this your biggest regret of them all?

I was 23
And you made me feel just like I did at 16
A sweet innocence that surely enough didn't come for free
I paid with a million tears and a hundred years
That I've aged since the very first day that we met
We've made our bed
And I guess now we need to die in it

You're addicted to this delusion of who you think you are
And once I challenged that false self, it was game over
I played my last cards and you pulled out a joker
It took some time for me to realise what was going on
And don't get me wrong, I don't think you're bad to the bone
We were just a bad match
But I truly hope you're not going to make anyone else ever feel like that again

Too coked up again to grasp the concept of empathy
I'm crying and I'm shaking on the floor while you're screaming at me
Stop screaming at me, I know how I feel
Your drunken words, they come straight out of hell
They slowly broke me more every day by day
I wanna believe in the good in you but I don't know how you live with yourself

I was 23
And you made me feel just like I did at 16
A sweet innocence that surely enough didn't come for free
I paid with a million tears and a hundred years
That I've aged since the very first day that we met
We've made our bed
And I guess now we need to die in it

Now I'm 25
And I'm done trying to fix men just to keep them in my life
Release them to the abyss, let the emotional vortex for once come to a rest
I'm all out of tears, aged too many years
Learned enough lessons to last a lifetime
But we've made our bed
And now it's time for us to die in it

Don't wanna hear from you
I need to heal from you
But you'd have to kill me to shut me up for good
And my heart is still full of what if-s and what could be-s
But at least my mind is now finally at peace
And I know you must think calling you out was my worst mistake
Since you've made me pay for it every single day
Was always caught in crippling doubt but I live to tell the tale now