Elementary, My Dear

Forty days and forty nights
Didn't it rain, children
Not a speck of land in sight
Didn't it, didn't it rain
But Noah built the ark so tight
They sailed on, children
And when at last the waters receded
And the dove brought back the olive tree leaf
He landed that ship near Mount Ararat
And one of his children grabbed Noah's robe and said
Hey Dad, how many animals on this old ark anyway, huh?

Elementary, my dear, two time two is four
Elementary, my dear, two time three is six
Elementary, my dear, two time four is eight
Elementary, my dear, two time five is ten

Two times one is two, of course
And it must occur to you
You get an even number
Every time you multiply by two

Elementary, my dear, two time six is twelve
Elementary, my dear, two time seven is fourteen
Elementary, my dear, two times eight is sixteen
Elementary, my dear, two times nine is eighteen

Two times ten is twenty, eleven twice is twenty-two
Double twelve that's twenty-four, thirteen twice is twenty-six
Fourteen twice is twenty-eight, fifteen twice is thirty, now you build it up on thirty
Sixteen twice is thirty-two, elementary
Seventeen twice is thirty-four, elementary
Eighteen twice is thirty-six, elementary
Nineteen twice is thirty-eight, elementary
Twenty twice is forty, and it must occur to you
You can double any number
All you do is multiply by two

Elementary, my dear, two time two is four (Woo!)
Elementary, my dear, two time three is six (Yeah!)
Elementary, my dear, two time four is eight (Woop!)
Elementary, my dear, two time five is ten (Yeah!)

Now, if you want to multiply two times 174
Or some big number like that
Two times 174 equals two times 100 plus two times 70 plus two times 4
That's all
So two times 174 equals 200 plus 140 plus 8, or 348
It's elementary!

Elementary, elementary

Twice 32 is 64, elementary
Twice 33 is 66, elementary
Twice 34 is 68, elementary
Twice 35 is 70, elementary
Yeah, yes, it's elementary, yeah

Now, what's two times 98?

Aww! That's hard!

No, it's very simple
Two times 98 equals two times a hundred, minus two times two
That's 200 minus four, 196
Elementary

Forty days and forty nights
Didn't it rain, children?



Credits
Writer(s): Bob Dorough
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