alcohol gives you a lens

Sun is up, think I'm feeling alright
Just a for a second, hey
Memories flood back inside
And my heart is beating away

And I said "get up, get up"
Oh don't lose your sight
My heart and head
They just wanna kill me alright?

Sip the blood of God and
I walked to an angel made of stone
I heard her whisper to me
"You're not alone"

And she said, "Hey, you've got these lessons"
"Hey, you've got this vision"
All the darkness and shit you went through was really for a reason
I promise, mm mm, oh I promise

Oh man I'm falling down
Hearts beats slower
Maybe I can spend a little dough
I feel like I deserve a little more
Baby I feel it all

Hold on for a second, think I'm done, I'm letting go
I hate being tied around my neck
I tend to lose control of myself
I tend to fall into a death
Only pulled out by someone else
And I don't know why I smile so much
Maybe this is all in my head
But when I'm panicking alone in my bed
I'm really conflicted, I don't I got meds
I wrote this sober, I know it's true
Tired of being apologized to

Please get out my dreams
I tend to cry in the night
Can't reason to myself
Why I ain't picking back up that knife

Maybe it's God, maybe it's angels
Pushing me onto, my road
Maybe it's friends, maybe it's parents
Even though I hated living at home
Living wit addiction, not far from that tree
And I'd write 10 more pages about that
But to do that I need to feel free

I'm feeling ok, I'm feeling alright
Should I kill myself, make things right
I'm on the road, top of the world
And I never felt love
And I don't feel love
And I never felt love
And I don't feel love
And I never felt love
And I don't feel love
And I don't feel