Politics at Home

Politics at home
I'm all alone
Politics at home
I'm all alone (all alone)
House politics, hood politics
I ain't grow up in the hood
My home was the hood
Not from the streets, don't test me, still a G
My home was the hood (you heard?)
Beefs, plots, and schemes
Phones tapped
Slaps and screams
Backstabbing fam ain't who they seem to be
Crabs in a bucket mentality
Sad to see (indeed)
Politics at home
I'm all alone
Politics at home
I'm all alone

Prone to every move analyzed like a drone
Prone to being the one that's not adored
A slight slip of the tongue and I'm done
Walking on a tightrope
Choking on the words caught in my throat
Indian soap opera, Tony Soprano
My dad was like the mom in I, Tonya
Livia Soprano, that was my grandma's twin
Still miss her though
Only child caught between two polar opposites
One pole the North, one pole the South
Me with a clamp, over my mouth
Psychologically hampered and tampered with
Brain damage from my parents' marriage
Rage filled pain fills the cages of my brain
Blame game, my dad hated my mom's fam
Aimed to frame and defame 'em
He had the phone lines in the house tapped
Tried to get me saying lies on cam
Videotapes for the court trial
I couldn't show I like her fam
Interviews with the child custody lawyer
Dad yelling when I told her the truth
His ruthless ways
Always checking over my shoulder
Feel like someone's eavesdropping
Pops secretly listening in
Crippling antics (tragic)

Politics at home
I'm all alone
Politics at home
I'm all alone (all alone)
House politics, hood politics
I ain't grow up in the hood
My home was the hood
Not from the streets, don't test me, still a G
My home was the hood (you heard?)
Beefs, plots, and schemes
Phones tapped
Slaps and screams
Backstabbing fam ain't who they seem to be
Crabs in a bucket mentality
Sad to see (indeed)
Politics at home
I'm all alone
Politics at home
I'm all alone

Grew up in a joint family sharing space
Had to brace myself, my mom told me points
Said my dad's fam that I lived with hated me
She was traumatized, said they didn't care
She was tryna protect me
Instead it left me scarred and scared
She overshared, made me an orphan
Feel like a burden on everyone 'til this day
Suffer in silence below the surface, I feared
Suffocate like a deer with a crippled gait
Me, 3 or 4, too young to be told this stuff
Grew up on edge with too much knowledge
Wrongs done against my mother
Her fam and her suffered
At the hands of my dad and his fam
They had to return back to Punjab
The pind could be the hood at times
They grinded to make it here, only to return
Put their dreams in an urn
They yearned for their daughter, my mother
The heartbreak killed my Nani, mom's mom
Heard lies 'bout my mom, she was villainized
Still I felt ashamed even if they were lies
Learned to numb my emotions
Maintain a cold front, Arctic Ocean
Mom had panic attacks
Visited the hospital, sat in her lap
Saw the cup of water in her hand shaking
As a daughter, could never do nothing
Free Willy, I was trapped
Could I leap over the wall? I was too small
Now I got SAD, OCPD
Social anxiety, paranoia
Oh yeah, flippin' out Nokia
But I ain't ever do no drugs
Diego Maradona? Nah, I'm sober

Politics at home
I'm all alone
Politics at home
I'm all alone (all alone)
House politics, hood politics
I ain't grow up in the hood
My home was the hood
Not from the streets, don't test me, still a G
My home was the hood (you heard?)
Beefs, plots, and schemes
Phones tapped
Slaps and screams
Backstabbing fam ain't who they seem to be
Crabs in a bucket mentality
Sad to see (indeed)
Politics at home
I'm all alone
Politics at home
I'm all alone

Product of my environment
Violent at times but I don't commit no crimes
Anger's a demon, I ain't tryna do time
Now I know the world's not black and white
Not just good and evil, it's gray
Way more complex, so I pray
Hurt people, hurt people
Intergenerational trauma, 1947 Partition
Grandpa had to flee home, his dad died on the way
Had to cremate him right there as a boy
He grew up and raised my dad strict
Dad did the same with me
That's all he knew, in his mind he's right
We clash and fight
In the past I held intense hatred inside
Instead, love's where freedom lies
Love's where peace lies
I cried when dad's mom, Biji died
Despite it all, she raised me
Death's the only thing guaranteed in life
Learn to love before you turn to dust



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