I Can Get It for You Wholesale - Miss Marmelstein

Miss Marmelstein, Miss Marmelstein, Miss Marmelstein, Miss Marmelstein
Miss Marmelstein, Miss Marmelstein, Miss Marmelstein, Miss Marmelstein

Oh, why is it always Miss Marmelstein? (Miss Marmelstein)
Miss Marmelstein (Miss Marmelstein)
Miss Marmelstein (Miss Marmelstein)
Other girls get called by their first names right away
They get cozy intimate, do you know what I mean?

And nobody calls me, "Hey, baby doll" (Miss Marmelstein)
Or "Honey dear" (Miss Marmelstein)
Or "Sweetie pie" (Miss Marmelstein)
Even my first name would be preferable
Though it's terrible, it might be better
It's Yetta
Or perhaps my second name, that's Tessye
Spelled T-E-S-S-Y-E
But no, no, it's always Miss Marmelstein (Miss Marmelstein)
You'd think at least Miss M they could try

(Miss Marmelstein) Miss Marmelstein
(Miss Marmelstein) Miss Marmelstein
(Miss Marmelstein)
Oh, I could die

I'm a very willing secretary
Enjoy my work as my employer will corroborate
Except for one disappointment, one fly in the ointment
It's great, I mean simply great

But the aggravation of my situation
I might as well get it off my chest
It's the drum appellation
Oh, pardon the big words I apply, but I was an English major at C.C.N.Y
The drum appellation
With which I am persistently addressed
Persistently, perpetually, continually, inevitably addressed
Believe me, it could drive a person positively psychosomatic

Why is it always Miss Marmelstein? (Miss Marmelstein)
Miss Marmelstein (Miss Marmelstein)
Miss Marmelstein (Miss Marmelstein)

Other girls get called by their nicknames right away
Slightly naughty or risky. Do you know what I mean?
Nobody calls me, "Koo-chee-koo" (Miss Marmelstein)
Or "Boobala" (Miss Marmelstein)
Or "Passion pie"

Even, "Hey there, babe" though not respectable
Ain't so objectable
It's kind of crummy but chummy
Of course, if I got married, that would do it
So, where's the lucky guy'?

'Till then it still is Miss Marmelstein (Miss Marmelstein)
Every day, I get more and more fast
(Miss Marmelstein) Miss Marmelstein
(Miss Marmelstein) Miss Marmelstein
(Miss Marmelstein)
Oh, I could bust!