Like John: A Mass Effect Song
What kind of man leaves his dead out to
rot, or threatens fake smugglers with guns?
Who punches crazed scientists there on
the spot, and disconnects calls just for fun?
Well, this kind of man,
he'll insult all his friends! He's mean and perpetually cross!
He'll make racist cracks at his squad Turian,
Then he'll shoot worthless crew LIKE A BOSS!
No one shoves goons like John
Out a window like John!
Pilfers pets when he gets too depressed quite like John!
Rigging slots makes him lots, blows off steam by frying bots!
None's insanely as angry as John
No one fights quite like John, highjacks flights quite like John,
Plays the double- no QUADRUPLE agent like John!
Xenocidal, hoplophile,
and aggressively tactile-no one
terrifies and vilifies the other guys like John!
If you act like a wimp, then he'll shoot you and your chimp!
If you're part of the council, RUN AND HIDE!
No one tases his foes,
wallops PRESS in the nose, and intimidates entire PLANETSIDES!
He's not scared of a worm even if it's twelve times tall!
Then he'll list all his trysts with your mom on bathroom stalls!
Then he'll trade her for her
DAUGHTER, who he chooses 'cause she's hotter!
Knowing people say its lethal quite like John.
No one hates Krogan mercs or helps swindle dirt-poor
clerks, no one blows off fans' toes, or behaves like giant jerks!
Who's defiantly untiring, and violently inspiring- NO-ONE BUT JOHN!
rot, or threatens fake smugglers with guns?
Who punches crazed scientists there on
the spot, and disconnects calls just for fun?
Well, this kind of man,
he'll insult all his friends! He's mean and perpetually cross!
He'll make racist cracks at his squad Turian,
Then he'll shoot worthless crew LIKE A BOSS!
No one shoves goons like John
Out a window like John!
Pilfers pets when he gets too depressed quite like John!
Rigging slots makes him lots, blows off steam by frying bots!
None's insanely as angry as John
No one fights quite like John, highjacks flights quite like John,
Plays the double- no QUADRUPLE agent like John!
Xenocidal, hoplophile,
and aggressively tactile-no one
terrifies and vilifies the other guys like John!
If you act like a wimp, then he'll shoot you and your chimp!
If you're part of the council, RUN AND HIDE!
No one tases his foes,
wallops PRESS in the nose, and intimidates entire PLANETSIDES!
He's not scared of a worm even if it's twelve times tall!
Then he'll list all his trysts with your mom on bathroom stalls!
Then he'll trade her for her
DAUGHTER, who he chooses 'cause she's hotter!
Knowing people say its lethal quite like John.
No one hates Krogan mercs or helps swindle dirt-poor
clerks, no one blows off fans' toes, or behaves like giant jerks!
Who's defiantly untiring, and violently inspiring- NO-ONE BUT JOHN!
Credits
Writer(s): Andrew John Pinkerton
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com
Link
Other Album Tracks
- O Metaknight: A Kirby Carol
- The Eggbot Bop
- Like John: A Mass Effect Song
- The Best We Can Be: A Princess Peach Musical (feat. Angi Viper)
- One Winged Office: A Sephiroth Song
- The Magikarp Song: A Pokemon Shanty
- Tetris: The Musical (feat. Emily Dane, David King & Casey Dwyer)
- The K. Rool Way: A Dk Isle Campaign Song
- This Isn't a Car: A Batman Parody Song
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