The Crack Was Ninety in the Isle of Man

Ah weren't we the rare old stock
Spent the evening getting locked
In the Ace of Hearts
Where the high stools were engaging
Over by the Butt Bridge, down by the dock
The boat she sailed at five o'clock
"Ah Hurry now lads" says Whack
"Or before we're there sure we'll all be back"
Carry him if you can
Oh the Craic was Ninety in the Isle of Man

Before we reached the Alexander Base
The ding dong we did surely raise
In the bar of the boat, had great sport
As the ship she sailed out from the port
Landed up in the Douglas Head
Enquiring for a vacant bed
To the dining room soon got shown
By a decent woman from up the road
Bate that if you can
Oh the Craic was Ninety in the Isle of Man

Next morning went for a ramble round
For to see the sights of Douglas Town
All went in for a mighty session
In a pub they call Dick Darby's
All got drunk by half past three
To sober up we went swimming in the sea
Back to the digs for the spruce up
While waitin' for the rosie
We all drew up our plan
Oh the Craic was Ninety in the Isle of Man

That night we went to the Texas Bar
We came back down by horse and car
Met Big Jim and we all went in
To drink some wine in Yeats's
The Liverpool Judies, it was said
Were all to be met in the Douglas Head
McShane was there in a tie and shirt
The foreign girls he was trying to flirt
Sayin' "Here girls I'm your man"
Oh the Craic was Ninety in the Isle of Man

Whacker fancied his good looks
With an Isle of Man woman he was struck
A Liverpool lad was by her side
And he pegging the jar into her
Whacker thought he'd take a chance
He asked the quare one out to dance
Round the floor they stepped it out
To Whack it was no bother
Everything was going to plan
Oh the Craic was Ninety in the Isle of Man

Well the Isle of Man woman fancied Whack
But your man stood there till his heads came back
And whack they all whacked into Whack
Poor Whack was landed on his back
The Douglas force arrived as well
Landed a couple of belts as well
Ended up in the Douglas jail
Until the Dublin boat did sail
Deported every man
Oh the Craic was Ninety in the Isle of Man
Yes he Craic was Ninety in the Isle of Man