Don't Bring Lulu

{Don't bring Lulu}
Your presence is requested, wrote little Johnny White,
But with this invitation, there is a stipulation
When you attend this party, you'll all be treated right,
But there's a wild and wooly woman you boys can't invite
You can bring Pearl, she's a darn nice girl,
But don't bring Lulu!
You can bring Rose with the turned-up nose,
But don't bring Lulu!
Lulu always wants to do
What the folks don't want her to
When she struts her stuff around,
London bridge is falling down!
You can bring cake or a porterhouse steak,
But don't bring Lulu!
Lulu gets blue and goes cuckoo
Like the clock upon the shelf
She's the kind of smarty breaks up every party,
Hullabaloo loo, don't bring Lulu,
I'll bring her myself!
Last week we had a party, a real high-toned affair,
And then along came Lulu, wild as any Zulu
She started in to Charleston, and how the boys did stare,
But when she did the hula-hula, then she got the air
You can bring Flo, her dad's got dough
But don't bring Lulu!
You can bring Lil, she's an awful pill,
But don't bring Lulu!
Lulu has the reddest hair, auburn here and henna there
How can we boys keep our heads?
Bulls go wild when they see red
You can bring peas and crackers and cheese,
But don't bring Lulu!
When she gets sore and slams the door
The plates fly off the shelf
She can make a feller wild on sarsaperilla
Hullabaloo loo, don't bring Lulu,
She'll come here herself
You can bring ham and crackers and jam
But don't bring Lulu!
Lulu goes wild, and when she's wild
She climbs upon the shelf!
She can make a pastor be a dancing master
Hullabaloo-loo, don't bring Lulu,
I'll bring her myself!