The Humpty Song

When you're up you're up
When you're up you're up
When you're up you're up
And when you're down you're down
When you're up you're up
And when you're down you're down
When you're up you're up

Humpty dumpty sat on the wall
Mary walked by Humpty took a fall
He was slippery into Mary's clam
Mary had a little lamb

When you're up you're up
And when you're down you're down
And when you're down you're down

Do you mash potatoes
Do you do the twist?
Do you like to get down
Do you do it like this?
Ernest asked Chante
If he could taste her yam
She said it's sweet and good
And you know you can

Meanwhile on the news
There was a large group of rats
They rounded up people
Wearing cowboy hats
They brought them into town
And put on a display
The rat population
Made money that way

When you're up you're up
And when you're down you're down
And when you're down you're down

In Silver Creek Utah
At the nuclear dump
Some unusual organisms
Were having a hump
They lived in a hole
Under the ground
And tourists would come
From miles around
To watch the
Silver Creek geyser
Explode in the air
They brought their instamatics
There were plenty of chairs
But what they thought
Was water
Pure and immaculate
Shot from these organisms
Was really ejaculate
Unknown to the tourists
It always got on their clothing
Of course if they'd known this
They'd have been
Filled with loathing
Tens of thousands
Were infected
Each year
By the strain
Of course it invaded
And took over their brains
To the outside world
They appeared like
Good nationals
Although on the inside
Not really rational
Normal by day
Deviant by dark
They set up groups
To open Silver Creek
Theme parks
By the thousands they spread
Across the whole USA
Ejaculate geysers spreading mutant DNA
Ejaculate geysers spreading mutant DNA
Ejaculate geysers spreading mutant DNA
Ejaculate geysers spreading mutant DNA
On the cover of Forbes
And Money magazine
It was a big time success
The American dream

When you're up you're up
And when you're down you're down
And when you're down you're down
And when you're down you're down
And when you're down you're down