A Picture So Clear

I guess it's safe to say
We both knew that this would come
So why does it hurt so much to say these words?
I counted your steps
As you walked through the gate
And heard the last turn your house key would ever make

How long was your suitcase
Packed and ready to go
Before I stumbled across it
In the back of our room?
How long would it have taken you
To work up the nerve
If I hadn't picked that day
To stay home from work?

I said
"If you want to go, just go"
Your face blank with surprise
Your lips formed words
But then fell short
As soon as your eyes met mine

I sat there and waited
For what felt like days
Not seeing or thinking
Just staying awake
I locked all the cabinets
In the other room
Saying, "you have to stay sober until you see this through"

Then the sound of your footsteps
And the key in the door
Your face bleached so pale
Your eyes glued to the floor
Your words died on contact
With the poisonous air
So without them you picked up
Your suitcase and left

I said
"If you want to go, just go"
Your face blank with surprise
Your lips formed words
But then fell short
As soon as your eyes met mine

"If you want to go, just go"
Your face blank with surprise
Your lips formed words
But then fell short
As soon as your eyes met mine