Test of Faith

I felt like a worthless child that needs to gain faith
And I keep a straight face 'cause it hurts to smile
Countless times of runnin' away, I had an upbringing
Of tough living, and my mother's to blame
Was never far from crime, drugs and vandalism
My father died quite young as a cancer victim
My heart was broken, that's when I started smokin'
'Cause I couldn't take the thought of my father goin'
It forever scarred my mind
Then my teenage years as a delinquent was some of my hardest times
Had to leave the past behind as my time to grow
Decided to come to the church and try and find a home
And as time passed, began going down the right path
Life starts again and so I found my kind heart
This life I chose, I crossed my heart and promised
That my relationship with God would always last the longest
I'm gainin' my faith, and I'm losin' the pain
I make my own destiny and I'm choosin' my fate
And I pray that God has mercy on my soul
Yeah, I pray that God has mercy on my soul...
And I'm losin' my faith, but I'm gainin' the pain
The end is near, now I just wait for the day
And I pray that God has mercy on my soul
Yeah, I pray that God has mercy on my soul...
I spent most of my life trying to guide souls to the light
Along the way I lost my faith and my devotion in Christ
Haunted by the darkness of doubt, closing my eyes
Have I followed teachings of a book totally blind?
Who truly wrote the first editions?
Am I living by the Lord's words of wisdom or a work of fiction?
I can't honestly serve religion
When as a priest, I've gradually lost trust in all church tradition
My test of faith and as an educated man
Can't believe God created everything in seven days
Will I pass through Heaven's gates and reach a better place?
When I've accepted money from the poor in my collection plates
And the exception's for a Catholic priest
Cold as the heart of man and deafening the sound of chattering teeth
Transformed from a man to a beast
Or at least a bit of rantings of a victim to the cancer disease
Excerpt from Blade Runner (slightly altered):
"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe...
All those moments will be lost in time... like tears in rain... time to die."



Credits
Writer(s): Emrah Emir
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

Link