Talkin' Sasquatch Blues

I was out walkin' in the woods one day and here comes Bigfoot puffin a "J".
He was laughin' to himself at some kind of joke as he sat along up and offered me
a toke.
He was covered in hair and three times the size of a man as for the spliff I could

barely lift it with both hands.
Tried my best though.
Well, we just stood there talkin' for a while about celebrities, sports, and foreign
oil
I ain't had many friends he said and he stopped, come back sometime, I'll show you

my crops.
Well I told him I would and I set out for home and left old Bigfoot standing there
alone
with a pair of binoculars around his neck,

people watchin'.
Well I ran right home all covered in soot and started tellin' everybody about me
and Bigfoot
I was stoned as hell and wound up like a watch but it turns out most folk ain't never

even seen a sasquatch
I guess that why they found it hard to believe that me and Bigfoot was smokin' trees
Maui Wowi, Swiss Miss, Turtle Power woo!
Well, one day I got to thinkin' about that giant puff and decided to look old Bigfoot
up
So I got me some paper from the paper store and went back to the place I'd seen him
before and I laid out the paper in a ten foot strip and started throwin' in hand-fulls
of California Chronic.

Then I rolled it all up and folded one end to a point and at the end of it all I
had a damn fine joint.
Like a hog's leg, Bob Marley
So I built me a campfire and I lit up one end when a voice from the darkness said
"puff puff pass my friend".
It was Bigfoot sure enough there in the trees carrying a keg of beer and a whole
stack of munchies.
From there it was just as you'd expect, he's a normal feller as you'll ever get.
We just spittin' and a hollerin' and carryin' on laughin' and a grinnin' and singin'
pop songs.
When out of the darkness I hear and ear shattering yell like a wounded cat or a hyena
from hell.
"Awh that's the misses calling me home" he said "Quick, can you smell my breath?
do my eyes look red?"
Well I lied and said no and I sure hope he made it cuz I tell you what he was lookin
pretty faded
faded like an 87' Honda Civic, been out in the sun too long.
Well that's my story kids and I swear it's true and maybe someday you'll tell it
to your grandkids too.