If You're Not Famous At Fourteen You're Finished

Some people think it's in your genes
Others find that view extreme
Either way, like an old has-been
You're finished now when you're fourteen
The pressure's on - you're off the pace
If agents aren't around your place
Bidding for your fresh young face
You ain't so hard to replace

If you're not famous at fourteen, you're finished

At ten you join some theatre crew
At eight you've been on T.V. too
At three, he can't sing "Beaches" through?
Book that kid more Gymbaroo!

There ain't no scouts from A.F.L?
There ain't no show reel! What the hell!?
No T.V? Not even Foxtel!?
Some people just can't raise kids well

It used to be at twenty-one
Then at eighteen the curtain come
But now at fourteen, look out son
That fork in your arse means you're done



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