Not so Great Britain

Take one policeman whose job is tough
Investigating a cover-up
Looks to his colleagues for support
Gets accused of nothing, has to leave the force

Not So Great Britain
Not So Great Britain
Not So Great
And who knows why?

We pride ourselves on our sporting name
Soccer after all is our national game
And yet in Europe our teams are banned
It's not the players they don't like, it's the fans

Not So Great Britain
Not So Great Britain
Not So Great
And who knows why?

It's the land of hope and glory
Where every school is preparatory
No wonder on election night
The Tories always win outright

I was taught at school it's wrong to tell lies
That golden rule it seems no longer applies
Next time your teacher says you lied, here's proof
Just say you're being economical with the truth

Not So Great Britain
Not So Great Britain
Not So Great
And who knows why?

In the kingdom of Jackanory
Where every picture it sells a story
Woe is me, what have we done?
Goodbye, Hong Kong, it's been fun

I know how I feel when a child is sick
You want to treat it and treat it quick
But what's gonna happen when the doctor says
"We'd love to treat you, but we have no beds?"

Not So Great Britain
Not So Great Britain
Not So Great
Not So Great Britain
Not So Great Britain
Not So Great
And who knows why?

Who knows why?
Who knows why?
Who knows why?
Who knows why?
Who knows why?
Who knows why?

So great in so many ways
But not in others (who knows why? Who knows why?)
So great in so many ways
But not in others (who knows why? Who knows why?)

So great in so many ways
But not in others (who knows why?)
So great in so many ways
But not in others (mmm, who knows why?)
So cool nobody's fool like any other (who knows why? Who knows why?)