The Easter Bunny Song (20th Anniversary Edition)

I saw a pretty bunny the other day,
Hoppin' with his basket, to and fro
Up and down the road on his merry way,
'til Mommy decided to go to the store...

(Noisy car taking off)

I heard Daddy say "Dear, you'd better slow down!" ("Ah! Slow down!")
"You really should take more care!"
"There's lots of little kiddies runnin' all around..."
"...and watch out for that little hare!" (Boing!)
Then I heard Mommy say: "What little bunny?"
As the car lunged over a hill. (Boing! Squishing sound)
And that's when Mommy saw the Easter Bunny
In her rear-view mirror... ...layin' still...

("9-1-1... 9-1-1!" Ambulance siren)

Yes, my Mommy killed the Easter Bunny.
My Mommy killed him dead.
My Daddy laughed but it wasn't funny
As the tires crushed his head... (Boing! Squishing sound)
Now you can't imagine how I felt like a fool
No, no, don't laugh, it wasn't funny...
When I had to stand in front of the whole damn school
And admit:
"Yes, it was my Mommy, who killed the Easter Bunny!"

(Boing! Squishing sound)

Now I'm all grown up, I've got a wife and a little boy of my own.
He seems to be happy leading a
normal life but he'd rather stay at home...
When we go out on Sunday afternoons to visit his dear ol' Granny
He says "I don't ever wanna see that ol' coot...
Cause she's the one... who killed the Easter Bunny!"

Yes, my Mommy killed the Easter Bunny.
My Mommy killed him dead.
My Daddy laughed but it wasn't funny
As the tires crushed his head... (Boing! Squishing sound)
Now you can't imagine how I felt like a jerk
No, no, don't laugh, it wasn't funny...
When I had to stand in front of the staff at work
And admit:
"Yes, it was my Mommy, who killed the Easter Bunny!"
(Boing! Squishing sound)
"She killed the Easter Bunny..."
(Boing! Squishing sound)

(Boing! Long squishing sound)