One for the Road

The door blew open and Jack blew in
He looked at the barkeep and said with a grin
"I must be going, I really can't stay
So pour me a drink and I'll be on my way"
Barkeep said, "What'll it be?"

Oh, I'll have one whiskey, one porter, one rye
And bring me some cider, I'll give that a try
Bring me two rums, one buttered, one cold
And bring me a scotch at least seven years old

Then bring on the wine, I'll start with the Port
And wash it all down with a beer of some sort
Some brandy and sherry some grog and some ale
Some old mountain dew and a good howlin' gale

Mead, stout, vermouth and gin
Vodka, bourbon, and a sly grin
Moonshine, tequila, cognac and schnapps
Some old sour mash and two belly flops
Goldwasser, ouzo, white lightning, green toad
Absinthe, sambuca, and one for the road!

Jack drank it down and said, "That was great!
But I must be going before it's too late"
Then his friends joined him and said, "Sit back down
If you must be going, we'll buy you a round"
Barkeep said, "What'll it be?"

Oh, I'll have one whiskey, one porter, one rye
And bring me some cider, I'll give that a try
Bring me two rums, one buttered, one cold
And bring me a scotch at least seven years old

Then bring on the wine, I'll start with the Port
And wash it all down with a beer of some sort
Some brandy and sherry some grog and some ale
Some old mountain dew and a good howlin' gale

Mead, stout, vermouth and gin
Vodka, bourbon, and a sly grin
Moonshine, tequila, cognac and schnapps
Some old sour mash and two belly flops
Goldwasser, ouzo, white lightning, green toad
Absinthe, sambuca, and one for the road!

With all his friends passed out on the floor
Still, Jack's bleary eyes were set on the door
The barkeep he said, "It's early you see
So sit right back on down 'cause this one's on me"
So Jack said, "Ut'll butt he?"
He was really drank

Oh, I'll have one whiskey, one porter, one rye
And bring me some cider, I'll give that a try
Bring me two rums, one buttered, one cold
And bring me a scotch at least seven years old

Then bring on the wine, I'll start with the Port
And wash it all down with a beer of some sort
Some brandy and sherry some grog and some ale
Some old mountain dew and a good howlin' gale

Mead, stout, vermouth and gin
Vodka, bourbon, and a sly grin
Moonshine, tequila, cognac and schnapps
Some old sour mash and two belly flops
Goldwasser, ouzo, white lightning, green toad
Absinthe, sambuca, and one for the road!

Two ladies entered Jack got to his feet
He motioned them over and said, "Have a seat"
Both the girls giggled, one gave him a wink
And Jack with a smile said, "I'll buy you a drink"
Barkeep said, "What'll it be?"

Oh, I'll have one whiskey, one porter, one rye
And bring me some cider, I'll give that a try
Bring me two rums, one buttered, one cold
And bring me a scotch at least seven years old

Then bring on the wine, I'll start with the Port
And wash it all down with a beer of some sort
Some brandy and sherry some grog and some ale
Some old mountain dew and a good howlin' gale

Mead, stout, vermouth and gin
Vodka, bourbon, and a sly grin
Moonshine, tequila, cognac and schnapps
Some old sour mash and two belly flops
Goldwasser, ouzo, white lightning, green toad
Absinthe, sambuca, and one for the road!

So Jack stood up and said, "I must be off"
The barkeep he said, "Now, I don't mean to scoff
But you're here nightly and never do go
So what's say we both have one for the road?"
Barkeep said, "What'll it be?"

Oh, I'll have one whiskey, one porter, one rye
And bring me some cider, I'll give that a try
Bring me two rums, one buttered, one cold
And bring me a scotch at least seven years old

Then bring on the wine, I'll start with the Port
And wash it all down with a beer of some sort
Some brandy and sherry some grog and some ale
Some old mountain dew and a good howlin' gale

Mead, stout, vermouth and gin
Vodka, bourbon, and a sly grin
Moonshine, tequila, cognac and schnapps
Some old sour mash and two belly flops
Goldwasser, ouzo, white lightning, green toad
Absinthe, sambuca, and one for the road!

Barkeep said, "Faster!"

Oh, I'll have one whiskey, one porter, one rye
And bring me some cider, I'll give that a try
Bring me two rums, one buttered, one cold
And bring me a scotch at least seven years old

Then bring on the wine, I'll start with the Port
And wash it all down with a beer of some sort
Some brandy and sherry some grog and some ale
Some old mountain dew and a good howlin' gale

Mead, stout, vermouth and gin
Vodka, bourbon, and a sly grin
Moonshine, tequila, cognac and schnapps
Some old sour mash and two belly flops
Goldwasser, ouzo, white lightning, green toad
Absinthe, sambuca, and one for the road!