Breathe Deep

The clerk smiled as she saw the same nut
Pick up a personal size grocery basket
And head down aisle two
She smiled because periodically this guy would return
With his basket full of glade
Lock and hold room freshener and deodorizer

It's a deodorizer that works on the same principle as a bug bomb
Simply push down on a button
And it fills the room with a scented fog
The man would buy only about five or six cans at a time
He'd been coming in for about five weeks now

Sometimes he would come in twice a week
He seemed like a normal guy
He was kind of balding in his mid thirties
Wearing a black leather jacket
And he was always so damn dusty
Something soft about his features
He wore a slight makeup but it was really just dust
He paid with a twenty and said thank you and left

The man returned home
He took the glade from the worthless little plastic sack
He placed one on the rug, one on the end table
One on the window sill, one under the TV
One by the air conditioner, this might seem unusual
Except for the fact that his entire apartment was just filled with them

Every room on every surface
He figured he had about 60 of them in all
Each one's nozzle's poised at the ready
He sighed and opened a beer
He started to push down the lock and hold buttons on the canisters
Slowly filling the room
Working his way from the dining room into the den
Each room filling with a multi-scented fog

Desert bloom, evergreen
Misty rose, fresh lemon
Regular and unscented
Potpourri, wild oak, petunia
Ocean mist, musk, hazel wood
Irish nights, sandal wood, rain forest
Country kitchen, natural prevention
Orange blossom, Indian summer and holiday candle

Calmly he sat on the couch
Spilt his beer, closed his eyes
Calmly he sat on the couch
Spilt his beer and closed his eyes