My Parents

Let me tell you about my parents
They're 79 apiece
They just got back from a luxury cruise
Around the isles of Greece
They've been 'round the world about 17 times
Since the day my dad retired
And their sense of purpose and energy
Really has to be admired
They're living life congrio
They've taken up trampolining
And that salsa course in Rio
Gave their sex life a whole new meaning
Oh, they're having a perfectly marvellous time
Blowing the money they've earned
But between you and me
I'm a bit concerned

Mama, don't spend me inheritance
Papa oh, why can't you see
If you both keep on the way you are
They'll be nothing left in the cookie jar
Oh, please
Save something for me

Let me tell you about my parents
They cause me a good deal of sorrow
As they winibego from Maine to Montana
They don't think about tomorrow
They signed up for a reverse morgage
Without consulting me first
Then promptly released all the equity
Well frankly, I'm fit to burst
But what if they have a crash
Get kidnapped or frostbitten?
Who'll make the mercy dash
To bring them back to Britain?
It's all very well for them to fly to Nice
And order expensive shellfish
But between you and me
It's a little bit selfish (selfish selfish selfish)

Mama, don't spend me inheritance
Papa, oh why can't you see
I've already had a very long wait
To get my hands on your estate
Oh please
Save something for me

Let me tell you about my parents
They're spending money like water
Goa, the Maldives, Azerbaijan
With never a thought for their daughter
I show them a lovely twilight home
And some sheltered accomodation
But they say they can't stand elderly people
And they're happy to die on vacation
But I've horrible debts of my own
And I've hinted quite politely
But this vagabond Darby and Joan
Remain provokingly spritely
If I'm going to get the money anyhow
Why can't I have some now?
There's always murder
But I can't think how

Mama, don't spend me inheritance
Papa, oh why can't you see
You know I love you, but when your money's through
Don't come to me, I'll have a button horse too
Oh please (please please)
Save something for me (me me me me me me me me)

Mama, don't spend me inheritance
Papa, oh why can't you see
You're living in style while I have to rough it
Can't you have the good grace to snuff it?
Please please please please please please please
Save something for me
Save something for me
Save something for me
Please!