(The Story of) The Preacher and the Bear

Well, the Preacher he went out a-walkin'
It was on one Sunday morn.
Course it was a'gin his religion but he took his gun along.
He shot himself some mighty fine quail and one little measly hare.
But on his way returnin' home, he met a great big, hmmm, grizzly bear.

Well, the bear sat down in the middle of the road
Just mean as he could be
And the Preacher he commenced a-shakin' and he climbed up a 'simmon tree.
Well, the bear stood up and he rolled his eyes and he shook his ugly head.
The Preacher looked up to the skies and these are the words he said:
(And these are the words he said)

Oh, Lord, delivered Daniel from the lion's den,
Delivered Jonah from the belly of the whale and then
The Hebrew chil'n from the fiery furnace, oh the Good Book do declare.
Well, Lord, Lord, if you can't help me,
For goodness sake, don't ya help that bear!
(Well, Lord, Lord, if you can't help me,
For goodness sake, don't ya help that bear!)

Well, the bear began to climb the tree and that made the Preacher sore.
The Preacher climbed still higher, 'til he couldn't climb no more.
Just about then this limb gave away and they both come a-tumblin' down.
The Preacher he began to pray
And you could hear it for miles all around.

Oh, Lord, delivered Daniel from the lion's den,
Delivered Jonah from the belly of the whale and then
The Hebrew chil'n from the fiery furnace, oh the Good Book do declare.
Well, Lord, Lord, if you can't help me,
For goodness sake, don't ya help that bear!
(Well, Lord, Lord, if you can't help me,
For goodness sake, don't ya help that bear!)

Well, they fought all the way down to the river and it was a terrible fight.
That bear was really layin' it on, but the Preacher, well he was doin' alright.
He dragged that beast right down in the water, it was . . .
Three times in and out.
Then the bear got loose and he limped away,
And the Preacher he began to shout:

Oh, Lord, delivered Daniel from the lion's den,
Delivered Jonah from the belly of the whale and then . . .
Now Lord, it may not seem like much
From where you sit up there,
But the hardest job I ever done was
Baptizin' that bear!
Yeah, the hardest job I every done was
Baptizin' that bear!

Oh, Lord, delivered Daniel from the lion's den,
Delivered Jonah from the belly of the whale and then
The Hebrew chil'n from the fiery furnace, oh the Good Book do declare,
Well, the hardest job I ever done was
Baptizin' that bear!
That's the story of the Preacher and the bear!