What the Hell (It's the Holidays)

It's that time of year, snow is on the ground
Pretty lights and mistletoe decorate our little town
Chris Kringle is loading up his sleigh

Oh-oh, it's the holidays

The table's set with cakes and pies, there's goodies all around
There's a turkey in the middle that weights 47 pounds
I know I should stay away

What the hell? It's the holidays

I've been doing great, counting calories and watching weight
But that big ol' honey bait is calling my name
Pass the butter beans, the biscuits and the gravy please
How about some pie with my next piece of cake?

What the hell? It's the holidays

Dad's fixing eggnog, he's pouring in the rum
Doctor says I shouldn't, but I'm gonna get me some
Just four or five will be okay

What the hell? It's the holidays

Now we're out at Barry's truck
Chasing maker's mark with Seven-Up
Cousin Kenny's throwing up, oh, what a shame
Steve brought his potato gun
Now we're gonna have some fun
Oops, he blew the window out of Mom's Chevrolet

What the hell? It's the holidays

It's that time of year, snow is on the ground
Dad just wrote his name in it, and I think you know how
All the silly games we play

What the hell? It's the holidays

The sheriff just hauled him away
What the hell? It's the holidays
Don't worry Dad, we'll get you out