White Curtains

Torn between
Being a child my whole life or the man you need
'Cause there's the easy way out
And there's blood, sweat and tears
And I'll be gone more than I'm home for the next year
And it'll take everything I have
To not stop running
You said it's never black and white with me
Just lesser truths and shades of grey
What the fuck did you see in me anyway?
An investment never worth the price you paid
For what it's worth I feel the strain
But I'm too fucking scared of doing the right thing
I'll never find it in myself to let someone love you properly
If I saved up the hours that I've spent just drowning
Starting out at the empty space from my side of the bed
Well, I'd tread them all and the pictures drawn
In the condensation on my window
To see you standing there
Lie to me,
Tell me you still need me 'cause I owe that charade
For the only reason I found sleep in the past three years
And I owe that charade
For the distance I keep between me and who I used to be
Torn between
Being a child my whole life or the man you need
Torn between
Being a child my whole life or the man you need
If I saved up the hours that I've spent just drowning
Starting out at the empty space from my side of the bed
Well, I'd tread them all and the pictures drawn
In the condensation on my window
To see you standing there
There's no shortage of new faces
And so many places I've never been
But the one place I keep in my head
Is where the sun shines through your white curtains
And the breeze that lifts them off the wall and gently wakes me to the world
To an overwhelming familiar smell of home
But I can't be there for long
And I never wanted to be the one that only lets you down
And a promise that I can keep is my two feet won't find the ground
But your heart can't see the damage done when I'm around.