Tojo Told Hitler

When they bomb Pearl Harbor that night, you know?
Tojo he jumped-up out of his bed, man, dialed the operator
Operators give me 1, 1, 0, 9, said,
"I wanna speak to Adolf Hitler who is a personal friend of mine."
Said, "Look operator, say,
I want you to get these goddamn numbers straight."
"So tell Adolf there ain't no use in Russia
'cause they already too motherfucking late."
By that time the phone rang,
you know, and Adolf jumped-up out of his bed
No hat on his head,
no shoes on his feet and his heart beating like steel
'Cause he knows Tojo was his driving wheel
"Hello Tojo", said, "Hello Adolpha'."
"I just called, I know you're the King of Japan this
year but I'm calling to tell you I'm a worried a man."
He said, "I just told my wife before I left."
When I get to your goddamn house I'd kick your goddamn ass myself
There ain't a goddamn thing you told me come out right
I thought you said them allies couldn't fight
You fooled us well down yon in Bouganville
For 15,000 of our best men just fucked around and got killed
Said that's what I told her last night before I left
If I get to your god damn house I'd kick your god damn ass myself
I was in the back then, you know, with my head in a paper sack
But I was steady telling Nellie to
kept her belly close to mine, you know

Well, well, well
Yeah
So the bee stung the bull and started them a buckin'
Even Adam broke the law and started the whole world a-fuckin'
JS:Oh yeah!
Yeah

And they said in the beginning,
there was just two people in the world just Eve and Adam
But there must have been someone else here
Eve know somebody else but Adam didn't but Eve did
Too many different nations of people in the world
I don't care what the people said
Somebody else gettin' in-between Eves legs