Cabinet Battle #1

Ladies and gentlemen
You could have been anywhere else in the world tonight,
But you're with us here in New York City.
Are you ready for a cabinet meeting, huh?
The issue on the table:
Secretary Hamilton's plan to assume
State debt and establish a national bank.
Secretary Jefferson, you have the floor, sir

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness
We fought for these ideals, we shouldn't settle for less
These are wise words, enterprising men quote 'em
Don't act surprised, you guys, cause I wrote 'em
Oww!
But Hamilton forgets
His plan would have the government assume states' debts
Now place your bets as to who that benefits?
The very seat of government where Hamilton sits

(Not true!)

Oh, if the shoe fits wear it!
If New York's in debt, why should Virginia bear it?
Uh, our debts are paid, I'm afraid
Don't tax the South cause we got it lay in the shade

In Virginia we plant seeds in the ground
We create, you just wanna move our money around
This financial plan is an outrageous demand
And it's too many damn pages for any man to understand

Stand with me in the land of the free
And pray to God we never see Hamilton's candidacy
Look, when Britain taxed our tea, we got frisky
Imagine what gon' happen when you try to tax our whiskey

Thank you, Secretary Jefferson.
Secretary Hamilton, your response?

Thomas, that was a real nice declaration
Welcome to the present, we're running a real nation
Would you like to join us?
Or stay mellow
Doing whatever the hell it is you do in Monticello

If we assume the debts
The union gets
A new line of credit
A financial diuretic
How do you not get it?
If we're aggressive and competitive
The union gets a boost
You'd rather give it a sedative?

A civics lesson from a slaver?
Hey neighbor: Your debts are paid cause you don't pay for labor
"We plant seeds in the South, we create!"
Man, keep ranting
We know who's really doing the planting

And another thing, mister "age-of-enlightenment"
Don't lecture me about the war, you didn't fight in it
You think I'm frightened of you, man?
We almost died in a trench
While you were off gettin' high with the French!

Thomas Jefferson, always hesitant with the president
Reticent, there isn't a plan he doesn't jettison
Madison, you mad as a hatter, so take your medicine
Damn, you in worse shape than the national debt is in!

Sittin' there useless as two shits
Hey, turn around, bend over, I'll show you where where my shoe fits

Excuse me!
Madison, Jefferson, take a walk.
Hamilton, take a walk!
We're gonna reconvene after a brief recess.
Hamilton?

Sir?

A word

You don't have the votes

You don't have the votes

A-ha-ha-ha-ha

You're gonna need congressional approval and you don't have the votes

Such a blunder sometimes it makes
Me wonder why I even bring the thunder

(Why he even brings the thunder)

You wanna pull yourself together?

I'm sorry these Virginians are birds of a feather

Young man, I'm from Virginia, so watch your mouth

Sir, we let congress get held hostage by the South?

You need the votes

No, we need bold strokes
We need this plan

No, you need to convince more folks

Well, James Madison won't talk to me
That's a non-starter

Uh, winning was easy, young man
Governing's harder

They're being intransigent

You have to find a compromise

But they don't have a plan, they just hate mine!

Convince them otherwise

And what happens if I don't get congressional approval?

I imagine they'll call for your removal

Sir?

Figure it out, Alexander
That's an order, from your commander