Cabinet Battle #1

Ladies and gentlemen, you coulda been anywhere in the world tonight
But you're here with us in New York City
Are you ready for a cabinet meeting, huh?
The issue on the table
Secretary Hamilton's plan to assume
State debt and establish a national bank
Secretary Jefferson, you have the floor, sir

Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness
We fought for these ideals; we shouldn't settle for less
These are wise words, enterprising men quote 'em
Don't act surprised, you guys, 'cause I wrote 'em
Oww, but Hamilton forgets
His plan would have the government assume state's debts
Now, place your bets as to who that benefits
The very seat of government where Hamilton sits

Not true!

Ooh, if the shoe fits, wear it
If New York's in debt, why should Virginia bear it?
Uh! Our debts are paid, I'm afraid
Don't tax the South 'cause we got it made in the shade

In Virginia, we plant seeds in the ground
We create, you just wanna move our money around
This financial plan is an outrageous demand
And it's too many damn pages for any man to understand
Stand with me in the land of the free
And pray to God we never see Hamilton's candidacy
Look, when Britain taxed our tea, we got frisky
Imagine what gon' happen when you try to tax our whiskey

Thank you, Secretary Jefferson
Secretary Hamilton, your response

Thomas, that was a real nice declaration
Welcome to the present, we're running a real nation
Would you like to join us, or stay mellow
Doin' whatever the hell it is you do in Monticello?

If we assume the debts, the union gets
A new line of credit, a financial diuretic
How do you not get it? If we're aggressive and competitive
The union gets a boost, you'd rather give it a sedative?
A civics lesson from a slaver, hey neighbor
Your debts are paid 'cause you don't pay for labor
"We plant seeds in the South, we create"
Yeah, keep ranting we know who's really doing the planting

And another thing, Mr. Age of Enlightenment
Don't lecture me about the war, you didn't fight in it
You think I'm frightened of you, man?
We almost died in a trench while you
Were off getting high with the French

Thomas Jefferson, always hesitant with the President reticent
There isn't a plan he doesn't jettison
Madison, you're mad as a hatter, son, take your medicine
Damn, you're in worse shape than the national debt is in
Sittin' there useless as two shits
Hey, turn around, bend over
I'll show you where my shoe fits

Excuse me! Madison, Jefferson
Take a walk! Hamilton, take a walk!
We'll reconvene after a brief recess
Hamilton!

Sir!

A word

You don't have the votes
You don't have the votes
(Aha-ha-ha ha!)
You're gonna need congressional approval and you don't have the votes

Such a blunder sometimes it makes me
Wonder why I even bring the thunder
Why he even brings the thunder

You wanna pull yourself together
I'm sorry, these Virginians are birds of a feather

Young man, I'm from Virginia, so watch your mouth
So we let Congress get held hostage by the South?

You need the votes
No, we need bold strokes, we need this plan

No, you need to convince more folks
James Madison won't talk to me, that's a nonstarter

Ah, winning was easy, young man, governing's harder
They're being intransigent

You have to find a compromise
But they don't have a plan, they just hate mine!

Convince them otherwise
What happens if I don't get congressional approval?

I imagine they'll call for your removal
Sir-

Figure it out, Alexander
That's an order from your commander